


New Year's Promise

by IWantBergamore



Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017) RPF, Call Me By Your Name - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, FaceTiming, Flashbacks, Fluff, Hand Jobs, Heartbreak, Inspired by Real Events, Jealousy, M/M, Oral Sex, Porn with Feelings, Pouting, Sexting, Texting, These Boys Like to Use Curse Words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-09-19 10:49:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20329897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IWantBergamore/pseuds/IWantBergamore
Summary: This is an imagination of Timmy’s reaction to two early 2019 videos of Armie and Liz where Armie avoids kissing her. A commitment has been made, but is it enough for Timmy to continue to put his life on hold?I LOVE reading angst...I have attempted to write it here. Along with some fluff and sexy times because these boys are in love.I am a relatively new Charmie fan, but I quickly became addicted to our boys, and this amazing fandom of talented writers.This is fiction, although I do throw lots of factual stuff in here from IG stories, interviews, actual content, etc.All mistakes are definitely my own. For ease of reading, texts are in bold font. Phone/facetime conversations are in italics.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The story begins Monday, February 11th, 2019. Timmy is hungover in London. It’s the day after the BAFTAs, and Armie is home in LA. I include a lot of flashbacks to explain (in my mind) how the boys get to this point in their relationship.
> 
> The Frank Ocean/Timmy interview in VMan Magazine is forever ingrained in my head, and apparently Timmy's. Timmy's words directly from that interview..."We listened to Sufjan Stevens [included on the soundtrack] with Luca and Armie [Hammer] right before we started shooting—that was an experience, to listen to that and, like, hold each other after." 
> 
> Louder for those in the back! "THAT WAS AN EXPERIENCE, TO LISTEN TO THAT AND, LIKE, HOLD EACH OTHER AFTER."
> 
> Ugh, these boys will be the death of me. Happy Charmie reading, with a good dose of angst for those of us that like that kind of thing.
> 
> Peace and Love

** Timmy: Two public videos with your hands all over her within a couple days? Ouch. Wtf Armie? Not what I needed to see right now. Thanks for that. **

** Armie: I know, I’m sorry T, I heard some videos were posted. But I am keeping my promise Timmy. I thought you'd be proud of me. LOL **

Armie waits for a reply. Minutes pass. He checks for texting bubbles...nothing. Regret creeps in about his “LOL” text.

If Armie was alone, he would Facetime him immediately...it would answer his questions. Is Timmy being sarcastic? Or is he really hurt? He knows every expression on his face better than he knows his own, and he has always loved that Timmy can’t hide his feelings behind his emerald eyes.

Texting will have to suffice right now, the kids are begging Armie for pancakes. Liz is busy on a conference call and Armie promised to keep them occupied.

** A: Tim. Talk to me. What’s going on? **

Timmy always replies quickly, he doesn’t play games. They normally send texts all day and try not to make the other one wait for replies. It would be too cruel since they are already apart most of the time.

They share schedules constantly so they know when they can reach each other, which isn’t easy with Timmy criss-crossing the globe every few days lately.

But with no reply now, Armie is uneasy. He feels a sinking pain in his chest, and it sinks deeper into his core as he imagines what Timmy must be thinking.

He quickly finds the videos on the internet to see exactly what Timmy is reacting to. Liz had posted one of them from Harper's preschool Valentine's fundraiser, the other was posted by paparazzi as they left another fundraiser Liz made him attend against his will. His heart sinks when he imagines Timmy seeing the smile on Armie’s face as he touches and grabs Liz all over. And he looks playful and happier than he actually was in the one Liz posted, thanks to a few too many drinks he used to cope with being on display for the preschool parents. Dammit.

He understands Timmy could be upset by these, but feels Tim should see right through them and realize they are just part of keeping up appearances for the press and public. The fact that Timmy is upset immediately upsets Armie. He feels responsible for Timmy, and even though he is 23 now, he will forever feel he is Timmy’s protector, as well as his true love, and he has made it his mission to guard his heart. Armie is unfortunately the cause of so much pain...it hurts him to accept that fact.

Now more than ever, with Timmy’s success and all of the attention on him, he feels even more protective. And their recent promise to each other has only deepened his commitment to him. Too many people are vying for Timmy's attention in Armie's opinion.

He knew this was coming, he warned him after CMBYN went from a small indie film to the movie on everyone’s lips and screens that Timmy would be the next hot Hollywood actor. But these people that are now globbing on to the Chalamet success train drive Armie crazy, even though he is so proud of his love’s accomplishments at such a young age.

He loves the accolades being heaped on Timmy, but he worries it’s too much too soon, and that some of the attention is just exploiting Tim. He went from a relatively unknown actor two years ago to now superstar heart-throb, loved by all: gay, straight, boys, girls, young and old.

Other celebrities cross rooms to take selfies with him, invite him to their Instagram-worthy birthday parties, offer front-row seats to fashion shows of designers dying to style him. He hangs out with his once-idols, now calling them friends, he has hundreds of IG stan accounts dedicated to him, CHALAMET AND CHILL is now the hottest t-shirt on celebs and fans...the list goes on and on.

And don’t even get Armie started on the Lily situation and the way she forces kisses on Timmy with instructions from their PR teams. Of course Lily doesn’t know about their new promise, so she will hopefully be out of the picture soon since Timmy is making no effort to keep up the charade for The King promo.

Timmy's agent Brian certainly doesn’t know their promise, although he might suspect something. He always suspects something.

Armie wants to shout to the world that Timmy is not their toy. Timmy needs his protection. Armie NEEDS to keep him safe, or at least keep him “his.” Special. Forever. Until he can make him his, officially.

Armie stares at his phone, hoping for a reply, and feels so many emotions. Ever since filming in Crema, he has had to battle these deeper, more intense feelings. His vulnerability used to be buried deep, but Luca had taught him how to access what Luca suspected was there all along.

Luca sensed during their meeting six years before CMBYN finally came about that Armie needed Luca in his life, that he could help him become a more authentic actor and person. Luca saw through his larger than life shell.

Luca fell in love with Armie after their meeting all those years ago, but he didn’t rush to cast him. Like true love, he was patient, keeping Armie in mind for the absolute perfect project, and here it was.

Luca also fell in love with Timmy after Brian and his partner Peter, whom would later become a producer on the film, sent clips of Timmy’s acting to Luca with a simple note that read…”Meet your Elio.” Timmy was only 17 at the time. Luca was quite impressed with this raw, unspoiled, humble, beautiful, young man, and especially the truth in his expressions.

Luca saw and desired something in both of them that he wanted to bring together. He was correct in his gut feelings about them. He laughs whenever anyone credits “the random luck of the universe” because it was something Luca felt and knew was there all along.

So when Luca brought Armie and Timmy together in Crema, he was determined to make the entire experience feel as enjoyable and relaxed as a summer holiday... and hopefully they would film a beautiful, sensual movie as a result.

Luca encouraged both actors to come early to absorb the atmosphere before shooting began. Luca had multiple lessons planned to make Elio a piano, Italian language, and guitar prodigy, so Timmy came weeks earlier, but Luca also wanted Armie to settle in to the laid-back Italian lifestyle.

He encouraged the co-stars to wander Crema alone on bikes during their first few days together, and at night he would cook them beautiful food, serve copious amounts of wine from the finest cellars in Crema, and casually show them his favorite movies about lovers and desire in his stylish designer-filled apartment.

As he felt and witnessed his boys grow closer after just these few days together, he introduced Sufjan’s songs written for their movie into their evenings. After a night or two of hearing the beautiful music floating among the laughter and conversations in his apartment, Luca knew the time was right.

As one night was coming to an end, and the other guests had left, Armie and Timmy had remained at the table in their own little world. They were laughing, smiling, telling stories about other actors they had worked with, while flirting with glances into each other’s eyes, held longer than necessary.

Luca came back to the dining room smiling, not wanting to interrupt their quiet conversation. Armie noticed Luca and realized they were the only guests left. "Oh, it must be late. We will let you get some sleep, Luca." Timmy rose, joining Armie.

"No, no, please stay. I finally have my boys to myself. I want to do a little something with you. More wine?"

Luca invited them into the sitting room and gestured for Armie and Timmy to sit on a small but comfortable sofa. They took their seats, and Luca then asked them to shift together so there was no space between them. They looked at each other and smiled, both inherently knowing nothing really surprises them because everything he does encourages sensuality and closeness This was Luca being Luca.

"I want you to feel Sufjan's music and begin to understand how it will help tell the story. Sit closer together, and hold hands, please." Armie and Timmy smiled again at each other while Luca walked to the stereo. A few moments later, Luca began to play Sufjan’s songs.

The boys seemed eager to do as suggested. They were loose, warm with wine, and the electricity between them was already charged high. This encouragement to touch was more than mutually welcomed. Armie had hugged Timmy the first day they met, but then didn't want to press more physical touch on Timmy until he seemed comfortable with him. Armie would be shocked to soon learn that after that first hug, touch, and brief hold, Timmy thought of little else.

As Armie reached for Timmy's hand, they turned their heads as well, eyes finding each other without hesitation or shyness. As soon as their hands clasped, Armie’s thumb caressed Timmy’s smaller fingers within his larger but tender grip. Luca is sure he heard a soft whimper from Timmy as this stroking began. Their heartbeats and breath seemed to fall in line with each other without effort. They felt alone in the room, again.

Before the first song was finished and without further encouragement, Luca was pleased to see Timmy was now nuzzled further towards Armie. Timmy’s cheek now flat on Armie’s shoulder, and Armie’s jaw softly rested on Timmy’s curls.

Their eyes were soft, unfocused, staring at their crossed forearms, clasped hands, and stroking thumbs, their bind softly placed on Timmy’s slender inner thigh.

Armie slowly moved his free hand to completely cover Timmy’s chest and hold Timmy’s shoulder, which made Timmy feel even more safe.

By the second song, they had shifted their bodies onto their sides to face one another, just inches apart, Timmy’s top leg now between Armie’s thighs, legs intertwined, foreheads pressed together, and eyes slowly opening and closing. "I've got you, Tim." Tim smiled at Armie’s eyes but quickly dropped his gaze, afraid Armie would see too much.

Their free hands now gently stroked each others’ arms, shoulders, and necks, with fingers finally finding rest in each others’ hair. Like lovers, not actors who merely met days ago.

The electricity in the room was palpable. Luca swallowed selfish thoughts away. He was so stirred by their energy, he felt compelled to turn the music off before Visions of Gideon was finished, and he quickly called it a night, apologizing that he was more tired than the thought.

The co-stars were slightly shaken by the abrupt end to the evening, both silently wondering if Luca was not impressed with their exercise. With hands clasped, Armie helped Timmy up from the sofa in a daze and they silently walked hand in hand to the door. The boys hugged Luca goodnight, thanked him for another amazing evening and Luca shut the door behind them.

Luca was immediately jealous of the flirty conversation and touches he would miss hearing and seeing on their walk home to their apartments a few blocks away, or perhaps to one apartment tonight? Let's not rush things, he thought to himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter continues a flashback to happier days in Crema. Armie is still reeling in LA with the phone silence from Timmy following his text about the Armie and Liz videos, the morning after the BAFTA awards in London.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More happy times, and of course more angst coming. Some fluff and sexy beginnings. Plus a hint of Armie's incredible British GQ shoot, with special guest Timmy involved. More on that next chapter :)

The next day, Luca asked them over to the Perlman villa to do their first official rehearsal, their only rehearsal...the infamous Elio and Oliver make out in the grass rehearsal. They’ve told this story a million times on the press tour which always elicited laughter, but the reality of it was the beautiful expression of genuine desire between his two leads. 

After last night, Luca wanted to continue the progression of intimacy under the guise of preparing for the movie, and he wanted to see if the vulnerability was still there without the wine, music, and seductive atmosphere that nighttime can encourage. 

As the co-stars laid in the grass and cautiously began to kiss, Luca knew right away they both were holding back. He understood they were reluctant to show the passion naturally happening between them, especially after Luca's reaction last night, and they both probably feared it would be inappropriate to show even more at this stage, especially before the camera was rolling. 

Luca stopped them after a few moments. “No no no boys. Stop. Please.” The boys were a little embarrassed at Luca’s disapproving tone as they separated and looked to him for direction.

He knelt down in the grass, put a hand on each of their faces, looked them both directly in the eyes and said, “My boys. It is okay to  feeeel this, do not hold it back. I know it is there. You both know it is there. I have been watching it develop. Remember, you are safe in my hands. You have found safety in each other. You are safe on this set. Now, show me what your bodies want to express to each other.”

As Luca gave them space, Timmy took his assurance to heart, eager to please his director. He found Armie’s eyes for a moment, then dropped his gaze to Armie's beautiful lips, not asking permission, it was more of a warning. He climbed on top of Armie, knees on the outside of Armie's hips, hands on either side of his cheeks and began kissing him with quiet pecks. Armie seemed stunned at first and let his younger co-star take charge. 

Luca watched Tim explore Armie’s upper lip, then nibble his lower lip until Armie decided to fully engage. He pulled Timmy deeper into the kiss, opened to let Timmy to fill him with his tongue, his breath, his desire, and encouraged Tim to lead...for the moment. Tim still held Armie’s head as if it were precious. He pulled back to check in with Armie, opened his eyes to find Armie looking for him too.

Their eye connection sparked more hunger in Armie. He stroked through Timmy's hair, fingered his curls and scalp, his tongue hungry, thumbs finding his jaw, then throat. The intense desire was instant, and he needed more. Armie wanted him closer, covering his back with his hands, pulling him down flat to his chest, rubbing his back and then running his hands up under Timmy’s shirt. Luca loved how it looked like Armie was swallowing Timmy’s entire body with his huge arms and hands. Luca could see their hips also searching for each other to deepen the sensations they felt so instantly.

Soft moans then came from them both, the sounds revealing so much. Armie's fire deepened as Timmy pressed his smaller hips and chest harder against him. He felt the need to show Timmy the effect of this on him. Armie rose on one elbow to shift Timmy onto his back. Armie never lost his lips, and their hips felt like magnets, their binding too strong to separate. The weight of Armie pressing Timmy into the ground resulted in more passion, more want, more moans. 

This was no longer a kiss. Armie exerted dominance, covered Timmy with his whole body, adjusting his long legs for the perfect fit against Timmy and his hard cock. While there was clear passion, there was no rush. Their hips subconsciously slid against each other, seeking friction and more time to savor this permission to touch, feel, explore. 

After gaining more confidence and trust with this reciprocation, their hands were eager for more skin as they searched for openings in clothing, their touches charged with desire but both bodies still moved in slow motion, like they wanted to savor this moment before Luca made them stop. 

After all, it was a rehearsal. 

Luca’s eyes fell away from them, turned towards a cluster of trees nearby, smiled, and without a word, turned around completely and silently walked into the villa. 

No one but Armie and Timmy know how long they continued their rehearsal, but Luca didn’t see them again the rest of the day. 

The boys jump at the chance to tell this part of the story, since it is a wonderful memory for both of them. Privately, the boys celebrate this day as the “anniversary” of the start of their romantic relationship. From this point on, nothing between them would ever be the same. 

Luca calls himself a voyeur, but that day, Luca had walked away because he felt like an intruder on an incredibly intimate moment. 

No cameras were rolling. No one else was there to watch. He wanted to let them resurface from their “kiss” feeling like they were the only two people in the world. 

The trust had been clearly cemented between them. Their connection was real, and the actors, now lovers, had found vulnerability and safety in each other, and their passion was beautiful, natural. Luca could not wait to see it demonstrated on film.

Armie experienced a personal transformation within days of arriving in Crema, and he had never been more alive, more himself, more…. in love? 

He felt desire and sensuality oozing from within, and from Timmy, from Luca, the villa, and Italy. He was seduced by it all as soon as he arrived. At first he was uncomfortable with what surfaced, but Luca’s encouragement to let himself “feel” quickly let him accept this newfound emotional depth and experience. 

Suddenly, he was free. Vulnerable. Happy. Excited. Giddy. Horny. He was a teenager again, but confident this time. What the hell? The environment encouraged these feelings, but it was Timmy who changed him forever.  


The emotions that make him vulnerable and true to himself were buried deep. He had a lifetime of practice burying. He is a Hammer, and Hammers don’t show weakness. Hammers also don't have forbidden love. You're allowed to sweep your women off their feet and steal them away from some other guy, but test the boundaries of conventional, accepted love? Do anything that isn’t what’s expected? It isn’t allowed. Fall in love with a man? God forbid. Never. It would bring shame to the Hammer name, not to mention his mother’s disapproval of homosexuality.

“For you in silence” resonated with him as soon as he read the script. But after his first few days with Timmy, he knew the shift he felt could only be explained by the safe, open, genuine love that Timmy exuded. This connection, this stirring between them was surprising at first, exciting, but also comfortable. Something in their souls saw each other for who they are. When they looked into each other’s eyes, they saw and accepted each other immediately, and with admiration, fondness, and lust. 

When asked about their chemistry, Timmy has always publicly claimed Armie was the one that made him feel safe, and that he was in Armie’s good hands, but in private, Armie declares to Timmy that it was the other way around. Timmy saved Armie from a life of never understanding what true love is, feels like, looks like. They were on the same page, and both changed each other’s lives forever, even if it had to be in silence to please everyone around them, for now. 

_________________________________________________

Armie shakes his head, pulls himself away from these reflections and looks at his phone...hoping he is only imagining the hurt in Timmy’s text, though deep down he knows better. Texts can be deceiving, he tries to convince himself. He hopes to appeal to Timmy’s memories of better days...

** A: Speaking of videos… **

** A: Did you see that some Charmie stans figured out you were at my British GQ shoot in November? You are in two of the fucking videos! And any observant fan who knows your laugh can tell it’s you laughing at me in the bedroom interview! **

No response. He keeps going, hoping Timmy will have to react eventually….

** A: They should have just asked you to “describe the Armie cologne” since I could barely answer with you cracking up next to me **

Still no response. Armie decides to go for broke.

** A: Thinking about that day gets me so hard for you T...feeling your breath in my neck to "check" my cologne description. God I wanted to pull you into that bed with me right then. Fuck, that was a great day together. I will never forget it. Remember the car ride? ;) **

Still, nothing. God dammit Tim, please respond, Armie thinks silently.  


**A: And so much for Eric promising no one would know you were there...that fucker probably told them to “accidentally” get you on video and put you in the edits. He loves to stir the shit. He seemed a little too happy that I brought you along. He wants you as much as I do. And then his bathtub comment? Wtf?**   


Armie can’t stand the silence, he tries yet again, he thinks maybe this will help.  


**A: Secretly, it’s exciting that people know you were there. It makes me happy that the world knows I want you with me whenever possible. Did I mention how much I’m missing you T? Every second of every day baby...**   


Armie’s phone vibrates. Thank God.

** T :  Yeah. Whatever. Hope it wasn't another problem for you at home or with the PR team. I gotta go **


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More angst for our boys. And memories of better days, including Armie's infamous British GQ photoshoot in November 2018. Some fluff and smut too for some angst reprieve. You lovely readers deserve it! And some Timmy POV too.

Not the response Armie was hoping for. Armie’s heart and stomach sink. He suddenly feels hot, he might get sick. He rereads the text, because his heart hurts so much for hurting Timmy he wants to punish himself even more. “Fuck. I’m such an asshole,” he murmurs under his breath.

Lying on his hotel bed, Tim hears his phone buzz again but he ignores it. Timmy swallows, hard, around a lump in his throat, knows this heartbreaking, stomach sinking feeling all too well. He fights back tears, again, and curses himself for having these intense feelings in the first place.

Of course Armie is trying to change the subject. Of course he is trying to take Timmy’s memory back to those amazing days together in LA and the Hollywood Hills.

Back to those two nights together at the Sunset Tower Hotel, their favorite hideaway in LA when they can make an excuse for not staying at Armie’s house.

Back to the memory of filling his own phone with private pics and videos he took of Armie at the GQ photoshoot that he would pleasure himself to when Armie went back to his real life, again.

They both had never been so turned on, and with good reason. It had been a couple weeks since they had seen each other and Armie knew the shoot would be sexy when he heard the plan for pool and water shots, silk pajamas, well-tailored suits, sports cars, a bedroom interview, Armie doing video commentary on CMBYN, etc. Armie wanted Timmy to be there, so he made it happen and scheduled it for when Timmy could be in LA.

His anticipation of the day and the effect on them was spot on. It was some of their best, carefree hours together in recent memory. It helped they spent the whole next day and night together for the Governor’s Awards as well.

With this now somewhat-public news about him being at the photoshoot, Timmy is secretly and selfishly hoping there were more pics and videos capturing them as they snuck what they thought were private kisses and touches during the clothing and set changes. If the world saw that, it would put an end to this charade once and for all.

Eric, the photographer GQ hired, had knowingly grinned when Timmy accompanied Armie into the changing area. Tim’s mind flashes back to the first stroke of Armie’s cock in those sinful Versace pajama bottoms, lips smashing against each other, Armie’s hands holding onto Timmy’s head and neck for dear life as Timmy couldn’t stop stroking him over the silky fabric, wishing for more time, more skin, maybe a quick cum in Timmy’s mouth?

But people were waiting on them. Armie tried to stop him. Timmy was relentless, whispering “This silk was made for you baby, my hand can’t help itself and you're so fucking huge. I’m gonna need your cock. Promise you will come inside me tonight. I need you to own me.” Timmy keeps kissing, rubbing.

Armie hissed and pulled away smiling. “Babe. Fuck. You have to stop baby. I have to get back out there.” Armie would make sure the now slightly “broken-in” pajamas would find their way to the suite tonight so Armie could feel Timmy slide his naked body entirely against him in them.

And then there was that fucking tailored-to-perfection suit he changed into next. God, how Timmy preferred Armie in a suit, his ass was so tempting in slim pants, and Armie knew it. He loved how Armie immediately took charge while wearing a suit. Timmy didn’t stand a chance for sanity with this one.

Before Armie left the changing area, Tim wrapped his arms between the jacket and Armie’s pressed white shirt, feeling the muscles in his back as Armie engulfed Timmy in a kiss. “Do you like this one?” Timmy whispered back “Are you fucking kidding me right now? We really need to get out of here. Can’t wait for tonight baby.” “Are you trying to kill me?” Armie said, as he gave Timmy’s lips one last soft kiss, gripping Timmy’s cock one last time.

Both hissed as they broke this touch away from each other, knowing they really couldn’t do this now, hard-ons were a problem.

But as Armie turned away, Timmy jumped on Armie’s back and pulled Armie back against the wall, pulling Armie’s chin down to kiss him more feverishly. When they can be alone, Timmy takes full advantage of the situation… knowing it is never enough time, so every stolen minute is a bonus. 

Armie matched Timmy’s passion, leaned off the wall and lifted Timmy up and against him, Timmy in the perfect position to rub forward, bringing their half-hard cocks together to increase friction. Armie stopped the kiss to find Timmy. Their eyes fucked as their cocks still found each other.

Timmy sensed he went to far, and Armie was too far gone. Timmy had to break the spell. He moved his lips to Armie’s ear and whispered a promise of finishing Armie off in the suit pants later. Armie hummed at the thought, and decided on a little surprise for Timmy at the end of the shoot. The boys laughed as Eric knocked to ask “everything ok in there guys? We are losing our light.”

GQ has had a long documented crush on Armie and Timmy, and Eric and his assistant were chill with what was really happening on this shoot, ignoring the constant eye-fucking between these two all day long, secretly admiring it, and let’s be honest, everyone there was turned on watching them interact.

Eric knew the photos would be better because of Timmy relaxing Armie, and inspiring Armie’s sultry stares that would break the internet. So he was happy to oblige the “friends” as they treated this shoot as one big foreplay. Armie sweet-talked the wardrobe manager to leave the suit and the pajamas for him as they repacked the cases to send back to the designers.

When shooting wrapped and the boys said their thank yous to the crew, Armie put the suit back on while Timmy and Eric exchanged contact info so Eric could send a couple him a couple special shots of them together. Armie came out, gave Eric one last bro hug, turned to Timmy and said in his lowest sexy voice, “Follow me, baby.” Timmy was getting hard already, walking behind the love of his life in the sexiest suit he has ever seen.

Armie led Timmy to the red sports car still in the driveway. Timmy grinned and wondered what they were doing, then immediately fantasized about Armie laying him over the top of it, fucking him silly right there and then, not caring who saw them.

When Armie opened the car door for Timmy, he was speechless and stopped to face Armie as he was about to get in. Armie moved his lips even closer to Timmy’s, staring into his eyes, “surprise babe... get in and let’s get the fuck out of here before they change their mind.” Timmy loved this spontaneous, carefree side of Armie. Armie was exuding happiness.

Armie handled the car just like he was fucking Timmy. He knew when to speed up, when to slow down, when to hold on to Timmy to keep him safe, and how to make the engine purr at all the right times. They quickly sped off toward a secluded spot that Armie remembered had an incredible view of the ocean, not too far from the photoshoot. Timmy was in awe of this man next to him and his sexy display of driving. His desire to please him had never been stronger.

Timmy had the advantage as the passenger, so he immediately turned towards Armie and lightly teased and stroked his cock through the luxurious suit fabric, laughing at Armie’s moaning and cursing as Timmy made him harder and harder. Armie had to take the opportunity to scare Tim again... "we're gonna craaaash!" both of them laughing with their whole bodies.

Armie was seriously losing focus, and after a sudden curve, Tim playfully commanded “Armie! Keep your eyes on the road!” All Armie wanted to do was watch Tim stroke his cock and look into his eyes burning with desire for him.

Timmy loved to see Armie squirm but took his hands away to tease Armie and hopefully get them to their destination safely. “That’s enough for you, baby. You’re gonna have to pull over if you want more.”

With the loss of Tim's touch, Armie's eyes immediately turned seductive, looking at Tim for a moment and longing for more before focusing even more intently on getting them to their destination as quickly as possible.

Timmy rested his temple and curls on the headrest, focused on Armie’s beautiful profile, mouth, eyelashes, and whispered “Do you have any idea the effect you have on me, Mr. Hammer?”

“No T, I don't. Why don't you show me?” Armie seductively teased, releasing a long breath. He could see an immediate change in Timmy’s expression as his eyes became hooded, greener, even more beautiful, focused on Armie's mouth.

“I just watched you completely charm every single person at that photoshoot, and eye fuck that camera lens, and though I should probably be jealous and insecure that they were on the receiving end of your fucking magic, all I can think about is that it is me you wanted there. It’s me in this car with you. It’s me you made love to last night and this morning. It’s me who is sleeping in your arms again tonight. You are the only person in this world that makes me feel safe and loved completely, and you are the only person I want touching me, kissing me, making love to me. Forever Armie. I just wish I could scream it to the world.”

Tim shook and dropped his head, as if the last sentence took years off of his young heart and tears filled his eyes.

Armie looked at Tim, reached over to squeeze his thigh, with tears welling in his eyes too. Timmy can never cry without Armie immediately feeling it too. After finding his voice, he said “Timmy, your love is the only love that matters to me. I love you. I love you with my whole giant heart. We will always find these times to be together. You are a part of me forever too. I promise.”

Timmy's weakest spot was hearing praise, love, and talk of forever from Armie. It is what gets him through their times apart, even when he thinks he can't survive another day.

When Armie found the spot, it was even more beautiful and perfect than he imagined, and they were alone. Timmy's mood was quickly lightened by the scene. Here they could be free, like they were back under the large open skies of northern Italy. They savored these stolen moments together, and it intensified their physical connection. 

As soon as the car was in park, Armie unbuckled his seat belt, braced his feet on the floorboard, slid up the back of his seat until his legs were straight, and lifted his body as high as could, now towering over the top edge of the windshield.

Timmy laughed “What are you doing? Come here! Fucking kiss me!” grabbing at his bicep. But Armie easily dodged his grip, lifted his huge arms overhead and yelled “I love Timothée Chalamet!” into the great, vast, valley below. Armie looked down at Timmy with pride and a huge smile on his face. "Is that what you want to do Tim? God, you’re right, that felt so fucking good."

Timmy giggled with pride, and pushed himself up as well, grabbed Armie’s hand to lift it in the air with his own. He gathered his voice and yelled, “My name is Timothee Hal Chalamet, and I love this beautiful man, Armand Douglas Hammer! Forever! Fuck yeah!”

Timmy was laughing so hard he started to double over. But before Timmy slid back down, Armie grabbed Timmy’s face, pulled him down and kissed Tim like he was starving. Like he hadn’t kissed him in years. Moans escaped and legs gave way, back into their seats, meeting in the middle. Armie never letting go of his baby.

After their kissing became soft again, with mutual whispers of how good this felt to be outside, together, unafraid, Timmy found his eyes. "God I love this, Armie." Timmy pulled away to reach his hand down to Armie's cock, stroking him while never leaving his eyes. He needed him, right now. "And now I need you in my mouth. (kiss) Right now."

Armie blissfully stroked his fingers through Timmy’s beautiful curls as Timmy undid Armie’s pants, his zipper, and then used his hands to push fabric down, freeing Armie's beautiful cock. Thank God Armie had gone commando...proving his bedroom interview true. Timmy bent over and began to kiss, tease, then worship and suck Armie, but quickly pulled off causing Armie to moan sadly.

“Where are you going?”

He reached up to grab Armie’s right hand out of his curls and brought it to his own mouth. He sucked in two of Armie’s fingers, while never breaking eye-contact with Armie. Armie’s cock twitched with jealousy but knew what Timmy wanted.

Timmy released his fingers and turned his attention back to Armie’s pulsing cock. Soft moans escaping them both through every breath. The sounds they make drive each other wild, it's their own language they replay in memory when apart.

Armie loved that Timmy was in looser pants so his fingers could easily slide down his back, under his waistband and in between his firm ass cheeks to find his ready, warm hole. Timmy knows if Armie has wet fingers, they will find their way to Timmy’s most sensitive spot.

Timmy moaned even more deeply with Armie’s teasing and eventual pressure there, adding vibration to his supple tongue on Armie’s already aching cock.

Armie’s appreciative moaning added excitement, and Timmy increased his sucking pace so feverish with thirst that Armie had to move his hand back to the curls covering his crotch to steady himself and slow Tim down. Armie watched his beautiful boy savor his cock like it was Timmy’s only nourishment for the week.

Watching Tim treat his cock this way while checking Armie’s reaction, looking into Armie’s eyes after every few seconds was Armie’s downfall. Timmy’s mouth was only on Armie for a couple of minutes, but after the build up of the whole day, Armie warned him “Coming, now!” and came violently, pulsing cum against the back of Timmy’s throat while moaning “yes, yes, yes, fuck yes Tim, drink me baby.” A few more thrusts into Timmy's willing mouth and Armie was completely spent and breathing rapidly, his hands running through Timmy’s hair and down his back, desperate to show Tim love as his body came down.

Timmy proudly swallowed Armie’s cum and licked the remnants that had escaped his mouth. "Fuck Tim, you're unbelievable. Every. Fucking. Time. Baby."

Timmy moaned with these words of praise. Armie quickly pulled Timmy over the seat and onto his lap.

Tim was able to deepen their kiss at this new angle, fully share his cum. "Mmm. (kiss) You taste so fucking good, see? (kiss) I can't get enough of you Armie. (kiss, lick) I want more."

Ever since the night after filming the peach scene, they have always shared. It was such a mental turn on for them, becoming one with each other, feeding each other, knowing they carried each other with them when they had to separate. They were always looking for reminders of those sweet days in Crema, to go back in time.

After Timmy was satisfied they had swallowed Armie from their tongues, he focused on grinding his cock down onto him like a horny teenager. Armie’s hands grabbed Tim’s hips. "Lift up T, it’s my fucking turn baby" Armie lifted Timmy to kneel above him and pulled Timmy’s pants down to his thighs. He gripped and stroked Timmy’s cock into his mouth, his tongue lavishly covered Timmy all they way down until he was fully engulfed. Armie hummed in pleasure. Tim shuttered with disbelief that Armie could make him feel like the first time, every time.

Timmy moaned, pulling Arnie's hair, "Mmm, Armie, yes. Fuck, your mouth is gonna kill me." Timmy moved a hand under Armie's chin to pull him off for a kiss. "Look at me." Timmy found his lips while staring into his eyes" Timmy lowered his hips and brought Armie's hand to his cock. "Mmm Armie, I want to see you. Look at me, touch me, and talk to me, please."

Armie loved when Timmy wanted to come this way. Armie began stroking softly, eyes burning into Timmy's, as he said all the dirty things Timmy loves.

“Fuck my hand baby, yeah baby, you sucked me so well.

Did you feel my cum hit the back of your throat?

You like it when I push your head down on me?

You were so thirsty for my cum.

Do you know how badly I want to fuck your tight ass right now?

I will make you ready with my tongue tonight, rim you, eat you, get you so wet so I can fuck you into the wall, the floor, the bed.

You're gonna scream my name baby.

You're gonna beg for me to fuck you harder (stroke) harder (stroke) harder.

That's it, baby. Fuck, you look so hot when you're on the edge.

You gonna come for me Tim?

Can you show me how much you want me?”

All Timmy could do was whisper his answers between breaths and strokes of his cock in Armie's hand.

“Yes Armie.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes. (Armie moved his left hand to Timmy's neck)

Mmm. Yeah

Yes.

Yeah baby.

Oh. Yeah.

Ugh (Choking sound as Armie squeezed his neck)

Fuck. Oh

Mmmhmm

I’ll come for you

You want me to?

I’m ready. Fuck you are so...

Here I come.

Ugh (Choking sound)

Oh. Fuuuuuck.

Armiiiiiiiiie”

"That's my boy

That's my Timmy

Come for me

Yes, baby

Yes. That’s it

Breathe

I've got you

I've got you babe

Let go."

Armie was careful to catch all of Timmy’s cum as he watched the beautiful ribbons from Tim paint his hands. Even his cum was beautiful, Armie thought. He lapped it up with his tongue, moaning. Timmy sat back and watched through heavy eyes, coming down from his high. They giggled as Timmy said “sharing is caring,” and sealed this intimacy with another slow, long, savored kiss.

They sat quietly for the next few minutes with arms wrapped around each other, heads heavy together, and watched the sunset. Their breath in sync, just like their hearts. Moments like these always felt a little melancholy, knowing they were never long enough. Neither of them wanted to be the one to notice it was time to go. At least tonight, they had the promise of more time later.

The air was chilly as they drove back to the shoot location. Pulling into the driveway, Timmy squeezed Armie’s hand. "Thank you for bringing me to the photo shoot, this is a day I'll never forget.” Armie turned to Timmy, squeezing his hand back, "Thank you Sweet T, for giving me my life.”

Timmy immediately got emotional, Armie saw it in his hanging head, pursed mouth, his lidded eyes, gestures which show Tim’s love but also pain. Armie dreads it. He reads Timmy’s face perfectly, it says... I love you, why do you hide me? Armie nodded his head a few times in acknowledgement with his blue eyes glistening and squeezed Timmy’s hand again. Always in sync, always understanding each other and the desire for more.

The car dealer was waiting to pick up the car but didn’t seem to mind that the beautiful stars had taken it for a ride, definitely hoping one of them would buy it. The thought actually crosses Armie’s mind before handing over the keys for now. "Thanks man, that was fun. It performed like a dream. Do you have a card?" Someday he will buy it for them, he plans in his head, while the dealer heaped praises on their movie.

As soon as the car drove away, Armie and Timmy just grinned at each other until they couldn’t hold it in any longer and doubled-over with laughter at what they had just gotten away with. Of course Armie couldn't resist and whispered “I was talking about you, not the car.” “Well I certainly hope so Armie,” as they got into Armie’s SUV to headed to their hotel.

___________________________________________________

Timmy is momentarily distracted with these memories from last November. Those beautiful days seem like years ago right now, not months...it’s about time the public learns that they live their genuine lives only when they are together, Timmy thinks, as more tears start to fall, knowing that is wishful thinking. He thought there was progress, but now wonders if this is the end.

Lying in this hotel room in London, thousands of miles from Armie, Timmy knows he’s being cold by not continuing this text conversation, but he doesn’t care. He is quite hungover to be honest, and he is feeling extra lonely and sad, and he wants Armie to feel his pain. For once. He wants him to feel the pain of getting pushed away. Of being inconvenient. Of being alone. For fucking once, let it be Armie that suffers. Tim immediately feels terrible for having these thoughts.

The distance is hard enough, but lately when Timmy sees these images of Armie in his “other” life, it is too much for him. Timmy is usually confident in their love. Even others observe that when they are together it is like they are the only two people in the world.

One look between them is all it takes to express their connection, the insatiable desire, the understanding, the promise of more, the reality of less, the lust, the secrets they will share forever. Soulmates. He remembers everything. Everyday. And it fucking hurts.

With the images of these recent videos of Armie with Liz now burned in his mind, he worries Armie is pulling away, losing his will to make this work, breaking the promise they made to each other less than two months ago. Some days hurt more than others. He can’t help it.

He finally looks at the text he received a few minutes ago.

** A: Wait Timmy...please don’t go. Let’s talk about this. Please **

Timmy can’t resist this one…so he replies

** T: Oh, you want to talk, huh? Ok call me. Oh that’s right, I’m sure you can’t. Can’t stand up to her, again? You promised things would be different. **

** A: Tim, stop, please. Listen. I wish I could talk but I can't right this second. Give me a chance to explain myself... **

**A: I knew the paparazzi would put that ridiculous getting in the car video out there after it happened, and I’m so sorry it hurt you**

**A: I have no control of who is filming what...but I was actually happy you would see I’m keeping our promise. And I did, I kept my promise. Aren’t you happy I didn’t kiss her even though she tried her hardest to get me to do it in front of the cameras?**

** A: Trust me, I was pissed too. She is arguing she never agreed that we wouldn’t act “normal” in public, especially with a camera there **

** A: I took major shit for that in the car on the way home. Liz is mortified my refusal to kiss her was caught on camera and our friends had to witness the shitshow fight on the way home **

Timmy isn’t responding, so Armie decides to just get it all out there.

**A: Then the preschool video...again, everyone there was telling us it was our turn in front of the camera, and shouting to kiss. But I didn’t do it. Fuck! I didn’t kiss her Tim! You can see I didn’t**

** A: I had no idea they would post it to their website and it would go viral **

** A: She was pissed the rest of the night, texting me at the event while sitting right next to me…”How dare you not kiss me in front of that camera? Are you trying to fucking embarrass me in public, again? In front of Harper's teachers and the other parents?” **

**A: I told her she was ridiculous for putting me on that fucking camera in the first place given our agreement. I think she keeps trying to kiss me publicly to see how far I will take our promise**

** A: Seriously, what preschool turns their fundraiser into a social media opportunity? This is where we are sending our kids? I want to pull Harper out of there **

Timmy reads the texts and thinks to himself, shut the fuck up Armie. You aren’t helping me. Or us.

** T: Go kiss your fucking wife. Leave me alone. I'm done **


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still in London, the day after the Baftas. Timmy is in a bad place and the angst continues along with a couple IG posts. Armie is desperate to connect and clear up the misunderstanding. Jewelry gifts, Golden Globes, some of the good things in this chapter because we all need good Charmie moments too. :)

Still lying in bed because his head is pounding from the hangover and the sorrow of reality, Timmy watches the videos again. He knows he shouldn’t, but he does. He can’t help it. Sometimes he wonders if he likes the pain, because at least its a real feeling he can count on. 

“Right now there’s sorrow. Pain. Don’t kill it and with it the joy you felt”. 

Michael’s monologue from the movie...he loves it and fucking hates it. It will be with him forever. He can’t help but think of it when Armie hurts him, yet again. 

But does he have to live by it and feel the pain over and over again, never getting time to heal? At this point Timmy has had many opportunities to end their relationship, but he hasn’t. He can’t bring himself to do it because he fears life won’t be worth living if Armie isn’t a part of it. 

His heartbreak quickly shifts to anger...Yeah he doesn’t kiss her, but his fucking hands are all over her body. Smiling and grabbing her breast in that red dress. Are we back there again? 

It’s been a while since he subjected me to that, Timmy thinks. On the press tour, Armie overcompensated and touched/groped/fondled Elizabeth when she was with them, threw her over his shoulder even in Rome of all places, trying to make his physical affection for Timmy stand out less.

Timmy was younger then, and more tolerant because he savored every minute of attention from Armie, and he never intended to break up a marriage and family. For a long time he was satisfied knowing Armie loved him and would spend as much time with him as possible. But as Timmy matures, he wants more, and dreams of forever, out in the open, with Armie. He wants his own family. He wants a home filled with those he loves. 

Timmy throws his phone on the floor to remove the temptation of more video replays, more texting. 

Timmy lays back, rolls his eyes, and feels the bracelets on his arm realizing he forgot to take them off after the BAFTAS last night. He concludes he was drunker than he thought. His rings as well, still there, and dammit, more reminders. They are gifts that had made him so happy. 

Every single time Armie was called on to present yet another award to Timmy during the CMBYN era, and now the BB era, he marked each occasion with another “memory” gift to Timmy. 

And sometimes gifts just showed up for Timmy for no reason, it was Armie’s thing that he could do under the radar of the press and others. Timmy didn't have a wife asking too many questions about a new bracelet, chain, etc. so Armie frequently indulged his desire to give him something, since he couldn’t give him everything. 

Timmy always thought it should be the other way around, he should be the one giving Armie gifts to thank him for being so gracious, presenting him with these awards and acting like he was happy to do it. He always felt like the gifts were too much from Armie, especially since he couldn't reciprocate.

Despite protests, Timmy was still over the top appreciative, and he loved that Armie picked things out for him. It made him feel special that Armie clothed him, decorated him, wanted to claim him. 

Armie promised every time it was the last gift he would buy him, so Timmy would willingly accept it, but Armie never intended to keep his word. He said it gave him more pleasure than Tim would ever understand, and it made him happy to choose things and imagine them on Timmy’s beautiful body. He wanted to shower Timmy with reminders of him and their love. 

All the gifts were meant to be seen by Armie when they had to be apart. Timmy wouldn’t tell Armie what to look for, so Armie had to study photos, interviews, etc to look for the clue somewhere on Timmy. After the first couple of gifts from Armie, Timmy had promised him that never a day would go by without wearing something Armie had given him. It was their private game they could share while apart. Or at least it was private for a while.

Armie liked that the stan blogs discussed and noticed his gifts. There is constant speculation about the meaning behind Timmy’s clothes and jewelry, especially the bracelets. It made Armie feel like he was recognizing their love publicly, without having to blow up his world. 

When Timmy wore the gifts, the implied “messages” to each other were clear... I’m thinking of you. I love you. You belong to me. Come kiss me, suck me, make love to me as soon as you can. Share my bed. Share our love. Take a piece of me with you. I want to feel your breath on my lips when you tell me you love me. Give me the only life I want. 

But today, the feel of the Cartier bracelets on his wrist and rings on his fingers symbolizing their love bring pain. Anguish. Self-loathing. More tears come to his eyes as sweet memories turn sour. The memories are sometimes ulcers on his weakest spots.  


In particular, these Cartier love rings on his middle and index finger are gut-wrenching. Armie had bought two matching rings, one for Timmy, and one for himself as an early Christmas present for Timmy after their perfect November days together in LA. Timmy was overwhelmed with happiness, but quickly fear.  


When Timmy convinced Armie that both of them suddenly wearing matching rings would be too much of a problem in Armie’s world, Armie asked Timmy to wear both rings on the occasions Tim was desperately missing Armie, so Tim would know Armie would be holding his hand if he could. 

He told Tim they were a promise of “more” one day. When this would happen though, sadly neither knew. Tim sighed and sat up to remove the offending jewelry in an attempt to stop today’s pain from quadrupling.  


Back in LA, the phone silence is killing Armie. He tries to deflect to yet another subject.  


Timmy’s phone vibrates. “Fuck. Leave me alone Armie.” Timmy says out loud as he sets the rings down on the nightstand, surprising himself with the conviction in his own voice. But of course, curiosity gets the best of him.  


Timmy looks over the edge of the bed to see where his phone landed earlier in his fit of anger.  


Oh man, he had forgotten. His Berlin boots are on the floor next to the bed, and next to the vibrating phone.  


Shit...he suddenly remembers being sad and posting an IG story of the boots last night when he got back to his hotel room at 4 am, feeling pretty buzzed and apparently nostalgic from the BAFTAs after party, where last year he had partied with Armie and then made stoned love to him for hours after.  


A horrifying second later, last night’s fog clears even more...he recalls he deleted two IG stories soon after posting them as the Armie and Elizabeth videos surfaced on his nightly browse of Tumblr blogs.  


Armie didn’t deserve that sweet, shared memory of the boots, he had ruined it with those fucking videos. He didn't deserve the "stars" he posts as a symbol of their years together. Timmy prays Armie didn’t see his stories and that the Charmie accounts didn’t capture them either or else it would be on his news feed for the next week. Wait, who was he kidding, the photos would show up on his stan accounts forever.  


Timmy wore the boots last night for him, knowing he would be watching. He had teased Armie, ”look at my whole outfit...not just at my crotch, ok?” Armie said he couldn’t make any promises about where his eyes and thoughts land, especially if he wears a fucking harness ever again. They were laughing and longing for each other, whispering desires, when they facetimed yesterday, before the BAFTA prep had begun and Brian started to hover.  


Timmy always kept his red carpet outfits a surprise from Armie, unless of course they got ready for one together. Armie liked to guess which designer Timmy had chosen to wear, but secretly loved being surprised. Timmy would try his best to not give it away when Armie insisted on guessing over facetime calls, often just laughing and hanging up on him after blowing him one last kiss as Armie wouldn't stop pestering him.

The Golden Globes outfit had nearly killed Armie. Armie couldn’t be there, so he made Timmy promise to get on the E! channel camera since the Hammer suite could watch E’s red carpet coverage from the Caymans.  


Armie needed to see him, the desire getting stronger by the day. What of his gifts would Timmy be wearing? Armie even had it streaming and recording on his phone as well to make sure he would have access to anything he wanted to rewatch later after everyone went to bed.  


Timmy happily obliged and looked straight into the E! camera for a few seconds before his Seacrest interview, with a come-fuck-me stare that was meant only for Armie. The message was received loud and clear, right to Armie’s cock. Armie had to excuse himself from the group of family gathered in their suite. “Was Timmy in a fucking harness?”  


Thank goodness his family was distracted and missed Timmy’s appearance at that moment because Armie could not hide his reaction. He took his phone to the bathroom and played that stare on repeat as he fantasized about Timmy in nothing but the harness on his knees in front of Armie. He also knew the jewelry too well...their Cartier rings. He recalled the memory of Timmy wearing them while stroking and sucking Armie as a thank you when Armie so proudly gave them to Tim. Someday they would be their wedding bands.  


Armie freed his throbbing cock and stroked himself. He could imagine Timmy encouraging him. “‘Do you like what you see Armie? I wore this just for you. Hold me off the bed with these straps and slam your cock into me Armie. Please?’” Armie came quickly now with these repeated visions, Timmy’s fuck me stare, and words as inspiration.  


Armie sent Timmy a selfie of his satisfied face from the bathroom with the caption…  


**A: Look at what you, your sex dungeon harness, and our rings did… and that fucking stare, you know it’s my favorite. I insist on using that harness the next time I see you. Straps again, Timmy? You trying to kill me?**   


**T: That was quick! It’s all for you. I’ll facetime you later tonight for my turn. Mmwaahh! I love you**

Armie loved that one second Timmy looked like a fucking sex slave, and then acted like a giddy school girl the next. For the next few weeks, the harness was a topic of fantasizing and sexts between them almost every day, knowing that after the promise they had made just days before the Golden Globes, they were the only source of release for each other.

But that was over a month ago. And now Timmy is convinced Armie isn't keeping their promise. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this chapter, we are back in London/LA and there is pain. Don't worry, it will get better. Thanks again for reading. Don't forget I love these boys. Peace and love, Charmies.

Armie’s IG feed and texts blew up with images of Timmy at the BAFTAs the second he stepped on the red carpet last night. This happens simultaneously with any public sighting of Timmy. And of course on nights like these, Armie is glued to his phone, waiting for more images throughout the night from the media, fans, friends, and of course, on the rare occasion that Timmy decides to post to his own accounts. Last night was one of those occasions.

“@Tchalamet added a story on Instagram,” his phone notification read. Three stars in a blacked out room. One star for each year they have been together, it’s one of their many codes. Fuck, Armie thought, here he goes, teasing the world, and Armie especially. Then quickly adding to the story, the boots on the floor with that heartbreaking caption. “berlin. 2 years ago today. [Crying emoji]”

His sentimental little Timmy. He wanted to get on a plane immediately and surprise him, even though he was due to see him in London in a few days anyway.

Armie got the BAFTAS boot message, the public but very private message loud and clear before Timmy deleted it: I miss you. I want you. I remember everything. I need you. Please come here. Fuck me, again, in these boots. Share this bed.

Armie had insisted on buying the boots for Timmy at Berlinale at the start of the festivals and press tour two years ago. They were killing time before their driver arrived to take them to their first event. Armie couldn't take his eyes off Timmy in his purple suede jacket as they roamed the upscale stores in the lobby of their hotel.

"Tim, you should get these boots. They would look good with that." Tim laughed "What's wrong with these?" Tim pointed to his Converse. "Nothing, but that jacket deserves better shoes. What size are you?" Tim answered, thinking nothing of it as Evelyn came in to tell them their car was here. Tim noticed Armie speaking to the sales clerk as Evelyn led Timmy out. Armie looked over his shoulder, "I'll be right there."

Armie had a huge smile on his face when he got into the car, handed the large box to Tim and said "here, try them on!" He knew they would be incredibly sexy on Timmy, and he knew Tim would love them. It was the start of the endless gift giving.

Timmy picks up the phone off the floor and furiously starts typing. But there are more messages waiting for him. He quickly reads them before sending his own.

**A: I’m sorry you are upset by those stupid videos Timmy. I spent last night admiring you from afar and longing to be by your side. You looked amazing on the BAFTA carpet. You are clearly H.A.’s muse and honestly I was jealous of the clothes that got to touch your body all night.**

**A: The Berlin boots discarded on your hotel room floor with that caption sliced me open. **

**A: I should have been there with you, again. I’ve been dying to hear from you since I saw the first pics of you... Talk to me, please**

Armie’s phone suddenly starts pinging constantly. He braces himself for what he will read….

** T: Of course I am happy you are clearly pulling away from her kisses in the videos **

** T: But it doesn’t stop the pain of not being the one by your side. You made me a promise, but it doesn't really look like the promise is in tact on your end **

** T: You are laughing and smiling in the videos. Talk about feeling like you have been sliced open...you have no idea the pain those images cause me **

** T: And your hands are all over her, touching her, feeling her **

** T: And I know you are going home together. **

** T: I immediately picture you fucking her because I remember everything, and walking in on you two fucking in Rome is forever seared into my brain **

** T: Remember how she had set me up for that? **

Oh fuck, Armie thought. They are both hurting, but Timmy is raging. His chest tightens and his stomach sinks.

** T: Remember how she told me to come into your suite before heading to that final media dinner, setting me up to find you pounding your dick into her? Remember that, Armie? **

** T: Especially painful after you fucking me just hours earlier before she got there. **

** T: No wonder she always insisted I have a key card for your room "in case you need us" after she became suspicious of us **

** T: She was planning it all along. I was so fucking stupid, thinking she had accepted me in your lives **

** T: She has always wanted to make it clear that you are only hers, not mine **

** T: Is she purposely dragging you in front of cameras now, despite the promise? **

** T: Stupid question, of course that’s what she is doing. That’s what she does **

** T: This is killing me. You BOTH are killing me. You are allowing this shit to happen **

** T: Especially this time of year, it’s worse for me. It ALWAYS is **

** T: Too many memories Armie. Every day brings back memories of special places we shared on the press tour and awards circuit **

** T: I can’t go to a fucking city without being reminded where and how many nights we spent together there **

** T: Where we had kissed, where you pushed me up against walls to get each other off in the restaurant bathrooms **

** T: When we were supposed to be sitting at a dinner with your wife, and other people we didn’t give a shit about in those moments **

** T: What am I supposed to do with all of these memories? **

** T: I wear them. I feel them **

** T: They are gutting me **

** T: I’m not sure how much longer I can live this way and I don’t think you quite understand that **

** T: Despite our promise to each other, she is putting you both on display more than ever for MY benefit, and it fucking HURTS Armie **

** T: And it is so cruel. To me **

** T: What does our promise actually mean to you? I fear it’s just making things worse. My expectations are higher since the promise, which makes reality worse **

** T: I think you made me that promise to appease me, to make me happy at the time, but now I don’t believe it’s what you want **

His quiet tears turn to sobbing.

Tears fill Armies eyes thousands of miles away too.

Tim is rarely this angry, but Armie knows the anger is coming more quickly lately. He knows Timmy is at his limit and it scares the shit out of him.

He has to do something. He quickly pounds out another couple of texts before grabbing his keys. 

** A: Timmy, you know I would give anything to be there with you to hold you, kiss you, breathe into you, so you could feel my devotion **

** A: My body and the love in my heart is all for you. Only you. Our time together isn’t enough for me either. You aren’t the only one hurting. Fuck, how do you doubt that? **

** A: I’m leaving my house to call you. Please answer **

Armie flies past Elizabeth in the kitchen and out the door. He doesn’t explain, just leaves.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, the pain is getting worse in this chapter, but I promise we are heading in the right direction. These boys needs to say these things. Don't hate me. Peace and love. :)

Armie starts his car, waits for his Bluetooth to connect so he can call Timmy. As he pulls out of his driveway, his phone pings steadily again, interrupting the call to Tim.

** T: Yeah, right. I’m the one sleeping alone and I’m forced to see your domestic “bliss” everytime I get on my goddamn phone. **

** T: If I read “husband” one more time….or how much you fucking love your wife because of some stupid chicken comment she made to your dad…. **

** T: I’m fucking done Armie **

Armie pulled over on the side of the road to read these and tries to call Timmy again. He is afraid to see his face, so no Facetime. But there is no answer.

** T: Fuck you Armie. Your actions are hurting me. Actions are louder than words. And I really don’t want to talk to you right now **

Armie tries again. No answer.

** A: Timmy, answer the fucking phone **

Armie tries a third time. Still no answer. He decides to just drive. A million thoughts running through his head but no answers on how to get Timmy to answer.

A few minutes later, incoming Facetime call from "Sweet T" appears on his screen. He pulls over quickly, nearly causing an accident behind him. He braces himself for seeing an upset Timmy but still answers as fast as he can.

_A: Timmy. Hi. Thank God you called_

Timmy rolls his eyes. They are red, bloodshot, in pain, wet. He looks straight into the camera.

_T: Can you see me Armie? Is this what you want? Does this get you off to have this power over me?_

His voice is cracking and it slices Armie from throat to heart again. There is uncomfortable silence, but Armie hears his strained breathing, his attempt to pull tears back in as he raises his voice, desparate for Armie to really hear him this time. 

_T: You are hurting me. I’m so fucking tired of being the one that gets hurt. Where is the fucking promise Armie? It’s definitely not in those videos!_

Armie is stunned silent. Afraid of saying anything. He feels like there is an elephant crushing his chest. He might throw up.

_A: Timmy...I...._

_T: Let me talk. I feel like I’m losing you. Or that it’s time to lose you. I've been so stupid. What was I thinking? You don’t care like you used to. Or maybe you care, but you don't actually love me._

_T: Or, or, or maybe you grew out of it. If you loved me, you wouldn’t have your hands all over her again. It’s fucking torture. You have told me for years that you have grown apart from her._

_A: That's true Timmy. We have grown apart..._

_T: If that's true….why are you doing this to me? You told me I inspired you to live your true life. Be vulnerable. Years later, nothing has changed. You just made me a promise Armie...what the fuck was I thinking? I’m so stupid. I should know better. I should know you could never love me like I love you. You are never going to leave her for me._

The tears start again. No attempt at holding the tears in this time. Timmy looks down, embarrased.

Unfortunately, Armie knows this face, these sounds. It guts Armie to see and hear them, again.

Tim drops the phone on the bed and Armie can only see his hotel room ceiling, but Tim’s tears are still heard.

_A: Timmy. Please. Stop for a second and breathe deeply for me. Look at me, please. Pick up the phone._

_A: Please, look at me, Tim._

_A: Please. Tim. Look at me please._

Armie is now choking back emotion too. Timmy picks up the phone, face visible to the camera, rubs his eyes

_A: Tim._

_A: You know me. You know Elizabeth_.

_A: You know our relationship better than anyone. You know it isn’t what it appears._

_A: You know I don’t want my kids to live with a divorce until they are old enough to understand it _

_has nothing to do with them._

_A: I have not broken our promise._

_A: If it is truly no longer working for you, I need to respect that and I will, but you need to understand it isn’t one sided. Far from it._

_T: That’s bullshit Armie...who, who is alone here? Me. Only me. It’s not fucking fair_

_A: Please listen Tim. I need you to hear me._

_A: Do you realize how I have to sit and wonder what all of these other people surrounding you mean to you? And wonder if you will fall in love with someone else? Someone that can give you EVERYTHING you want? Someone with no restraints?_

_A: I feel like the Timmy fan club is exploding, and these fucking wanna-be-yours are coming out of the woodwork to get close to you._

_A: Everyone and their fucking mother is in love with you. What are they saying to you when I see them lean in and whisper in your ear?_

_A: Are they touching you? Are you getting turned on?_

_A: The thought of you replacing me while you wait for me scares me more than anything Tim._

_A: They don’t have Crema with you. They don’t know what we have shared._

_A: They cannot possibly love you like I do. I hope you can’t love anyone like I believe you love me. But I don’t know, the fear is always there._

Timmy’s fingers now cover his eyes, rubbing the tears away, but really just making them fall quicker. Armie can’t stop his own paranoid rant now.

_A: Are they falling head over heels in love with you, instantly, like I did?_

_A: Lily, Ocean, Cudi, Harry, Virgil, Andrew, Tyler, Rami, Matty, Troye, Xavier, Pattinson...fuck Tim, too fucking many to even keep track of. Do you have any idea how I feel when I see these pictures on my feed?_

_A: I fucking know those Vuitton bracelets on Cudi are from you. How could you do that to me? You know jewelry is OUR thing. And when you look so fucking hot. And happy. And you aren’t with me? It hurts Tim. I’m hurting too. Every day._

Armie fights back tears. They are both silent for what seems like minutes. They know the pain is real on both ends of the line. But Armie can’t stop now that he has started...

_A: And then you post this fucking picture of the boots I bought you in Berlin with the reminder it has been two years….you tease me on SM?! I would have given anything to be there last night, you know that._

_T: Armie, stop!_

Armie is crying now, he needs to get this off his chest too

_A: Do you have any idea how hard it is to hide my tears in my fucking house? I am never alone, never allowed to just feel the pain and let it show._

_A: My life is all about repressing it. Strong, tall, in-charge Armie. Never allowed to be anything but charming, happy, larger than life._

_A: Telling stories to make everyone else happy, I'm fucking miserable without you. And YOU know this. I have cried this misery on your chest so many times. You are the only one that knows me Tim. The only one I can trust. How dare you doubt my love for you. YOU ARE MY ONLY ONE._

Timmy can’t process all of the thoughts running through his mind right now. His head hurts even more.

_T: I'm sorry, I need to go._

He presses the end call button, closes his eyes, pushing more tears down his cheeks, and thinks back to New Years, just about 5 weeks ago, and the promise of more.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally new years eve...lots of fireworks, but also hope. Thank you for reading!

The “promise” was a New Year’s promise, or they could have called it a resolution. Both were pretty drunk when they slipped away to their planned Facetime call to each other minutes before midnight in the Caribbean on New Years Eve. Only a few islands apart, but it felt like a universe with the millions of stars overhead. Timmy smiled when he answered the call, but quickly became sad when he focused on Armie’s beautiful face. That had been happening a lot lately. Armie picked up on it immediately. 

_ A: Happy new year, Sweet T. God I miss you.  _

_T: Hey_

_ A: You look so good. I would kiss you through the phone if I could. Hey…. _

Timmy smiles wide at first, faking happiness for Armie, then averted his eyes, his face falls away from the camera too. Armie thinks he saw his eyes glistening with tears before he looked away.

_ A: Hey, what's wrong, babe? Hey, look into the phone. Let me see you. Please? _

Timmy lifted his eyes. Shit. Armie cannot handle Timmy’s tear-filled eyes. He wanted to hire a charter flight right now to take him to whatever fucking island Timmy was on and wrap his arms around him. Stop his tears. Protect him.  


_A: Babe, please tell me what is going on… I love you. What's wrong?_

_ T: These fucking constant IG stories from her Armie. I’m not cut out for this. I can’t do it. I love you but I think it is doing me more harm to love you while I see you loving her, living your life that I will never have with you. I love your kids, and I know how important your family is to you. I hate that I am so sad to see it lately. It’s not right for either of us. I can’t go into another year like this. _

Armie’s heart stops in his chest. His stomach churns. Fuck. No. No!

_A: No! Timmy, please don’t say that. I love you. You know most of this is to promote her business and my image. She is using us for it. So is my publicist. You KNOW all of this. You need to ignore her posts. Seriously, unfollow her right now. It's fucking bullshit._

_ T: Why are you letting them do that? You are an established actor Armie. Isn’t it time you be real, for yourself? For us? And I only watch her posts because I’m so fucking desperate to see you and the kids whenever and however I can. Don’t you understand that by now? _

_ A: I’m keeping the peace by going along with her posts...it helps keep her from complaining about you and me and our times together. And you know how I feel about divorce right now. I will not do that to my kids. And my agent and PR consultants are constantly insisting on the loving husband image…are you forgetting I just had to endure you spending your birthday on an island with Lily and not me? _

Timmy interrupts, more urgent now

_ T: Ok that’s low Armie...you know that has been forced on us. You know I barely even tolerate her as a friend. She is a non-issue and you know that.  _

Armie rolls his eyes.  


_T: I thought I would be ok with having you when I could, but how long can I put my heart on hold? Huh Armie? How long do I put my life and heart and happiness on hold? I’m afraid the answer is forever._

_ A: I didn't know you think of it that way. I thought our hearts were full when we are together? We do everything we can to be together...I thought... _

_ T: I know, and my heart is full when we are. But lately I’m really struggling. I’m sure Elizabeth hates me, and eventually you will too if your kids resent me as they get older. Then where am I? What am I left with?  _

_A: Timmy. I could never hate you, I love you more than anyone in this world. You are the only person that truly knows me. And she doesn’t hate you. And my kids love you like family. You KNOW that._

_ T: No seriously Armie. What do I HAVE? _

_ A: You have me, Tim.  _

Neither one speaks for what seems like minutes. Lots of sighs, sniffles, glances to the screen to see who is brave enough to look for the other’s eyes. Finally, Armie speaks.

_ A: Timmy. Look at me. You have my heart, you own my heart. You are all I think about all day, everyday. I don't want anyone but you Tim. I will tell her tonight that I am in love with you. She has accused me of loving you so many times, in every single argument. But tonight, I will stop denying it. I will own it and tell her that she is right. I do love you, and that I need her to know that. I want to start 2019 with this clear. She will know where my heart lies once and for all. I love you Timmy. I need you to believe in me. In us. And I will do anything you want me to do. Please, you cannot end this. You will kill me and I cannot live with the thought of you not in my life.  _

_ T: But you've said you don’t want a divorce while your kids are young. Does that mean you aren't leaving her unless she kicks you out? We both know that isn’t happening. You still won't be mine...your confession to her won’t change anything. If anything, she will make things worse for us. _

_A: What if I promise you from here forward that I will also stop sleeping with her, kissing her...no more physical affection? I only want you to have that part of me, from now until forever. And if it’s ok, can I ask the same from you? So that I know when we are apart and you are out there living and fulfilling your dreams that you’re still going home alone at night and your body and soul are only mine? I want the same from you if we are going to do this. I want us to commit our bodies only to each other. I need that connection._

_T: I don't know Armie. I’m not sure I can make that promise with how I’m feeling._   


_A: Why? Are you giving yourself to someone else? Or….is there someone else you’re thinking about? And please don’t tell me this PR thing with Lily is actually something physical….fuck, please no._   


_T: NO! I could never do that to you without talking to you about it first. And I’ve told you a million times I’m not attracted to her, I just have to tolerate this PR bullshit a little longer. I could never enter into a relationship without talking to you about it. I don’t ever want you to feel this pain like I do of being blindsided with images of you and your happy other life. But I have shouldered it alone for too long. I think I’m at my breaking point._

Timmy’s wet eyes start again, he drops his head ashamed to let Armie see how sad he is and how pathetic he feels. After a minute of silence, Timmy lifts his eyes to the camera.

_T: Armie, can you see my heart right now? Cor cordium Armie. You are my heart of hearts. I’m afraid the damage to my heart will never be healed if I keep waiting for you to give me yours._   


_A: Yes. (long pause) Cor cordium Tim._

Armie sounds sincere, like he has never believed anything more than this. Tim rolls his eyes, happy to hear it, but not convinced.

_A: God, please believe me. Please trust me. Please, let me prove this to you and see how you feel when I show you that I only want you and only you will have me._   


Timmy is silent, but he already knows he will accept this New Year’s promise, their resolution, their latest “arrangement” to keep themselves sane. What other choice does he realistically have? Despite these protests, he knows himself and knows he doesn’t feel life is worth living without Armie. A year ago, this kind of promise would have been a dream.

_ T: Ok.  _

Timmy sounds defeated.

_ A: Ok? Like ok, yes? To this promise? _

Timmy lifts his face, takes a deep breath, looks into the camera again, his eyes still wet.

_ T: Yes, ok. To the promise. Prove it to me Armie. Please don’t let this be some bullshit promise that hurts me worse when you can’t keep your end of it.  _

Timmy takes a deep breath in and out again, feels like he is taking a huge leap of faith here.

_ A: It isn’t a bullshit promise Tim. It is what I want for us. It is one step closer to our forever. I wish it could be more now, but I appreciate you giving us this chance. Thank you for this Tim. I love you. I LOVE you. _

Fireworks suddenly begin bursting above both of their heads on both islands. It is midnight. Timmy can’t help but let a little giggle come out and let some sadness go.

_ T: Bonne année, Armie.  _

He puckers his lips and kisses toward the camera, his face now glowing with reds, oranges, blues, and leftover streaks from his tears catch the fireworks’ light.  


Armie tears up again, overcome with the emotion of his love for Tim. He looks Tim straight in the eye and says in his most beautiful voice that melts Tim every single time.  


_A: Happy new year, my Sweet T. I promise things will be better for us. You have my promise. You have my heart. Cor cordium Tim. Say it again, please? For this new year?_

_ T: Cor cordium Armie. And you have my promise too. _

_T: Will you talk to Liz about all of this before the night is over? I need to know we are starting the entire year this way and that you aren’t climbing into bed with her when we hang up the phone._

_ A: Yes, I will talk to her now, I promise. The kids are in bed, the rest of our family will leave soon. This day marks another beginning in our forever Tim. I love you. Please, don’t be sad anymore. I’ll call you in the morning. Please… (he swallows and looks for Timmy’s eyes ) look at me. Tell me you love me before we say goodbye. _

Timmy looks directly into his eyes...

_ T: I love you Armand Douglas Hammer, with all of my fragile heart.  _

Tim sniffles, fighting back emotion again with the sound of these words and presses the end call button.

Armie feels joy and pain. Happiness and longing. He wishes he could reach through the phone and hold him, devour his lips, his neck, his body. He vows to himself to build Timmy’s heart back up into the pulsing, full, confident fiery muscle Timmy deserves. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> January 1st, 2019. It's a great day. These boys are on the same page, finally. For now ;)  
Reminder - texts in bold, phone or Facetime convos are in italics.

As the sun started to rise, Timmy’s phone buzzes, earlier than it should on New Years Day. It was a text from Armie.

**A: I’m yours. Only yours. God that makes me horny. Wanna sext now?!** (Winky kiss face emoji)

Timmy laughs but isn’t ready to let the serious subject slip away just yet.

**T: How did it go? Can we talk?**

Incoming Facetime call from “Elio” appears immediately on Timmy’s phone. The contact name makes Timmy smile, most of the time

_ A: Morning babe. Happy new year, again. God you look sexy in that bed. So glad you’re alone because I want to talk you through all kinds of sex right now. _

T: (Yawning…then moaning at the choice of Armie’s words) _Hi babe. How did you get away?_

_ A: I told her I needed to call you so I left the suite. Things are going to be different for us from now on Timmy. I promise. No more sneaking around her. _

_ T: You are making me very happy, sir. In fact, I feel like jumping!...wanna see? _

Timmy’s voice is giddy and he is grinning from ear to ear, suddenly very awake with the fulfilled promise from Armie. Armie loves his Timmy like this. Timmy quickly gets up and starts jumping on the bed. He is naked so Armie is really enjoying the view. No one can make Armie blush and belly-laugh like Timmy. When they are laughing so hard Timmy can’t jump anymore, he flops back on the bed.

_ A: Thanks for that view! Lucky bed! Promise to do that again for me next time I see you? _

Timmy looks straight into Armie’s eyes, laughing and proud of his playfulness that Armie loves. He catches his breath.

_ T: Sure baby, I’ll jump for you anytime if you can keep your hands off me long enough! So…. tell me, how did it go? Or do I want to know the details? _

_ A: _ _So... we talked last night, right after I got off the phone with you. Everyone had left, thankfully. She wasn’t happy that I had disappeared right before midnight and asked where I had been. I told her I was talking to you. Of course, that didn’t go over well, and I told her we needed to talk. I swear she read the emotion on my face for the first time. She definitely knew what was coming._ _She was upset, but her reaction made me think she was waiting for this day to come. She has known how miserable I have been for a while, pretending that you don’t occupy my heart._

Timmy is looking at Armie, trying to focus on every syllable of these words, promising their future, this big step forward in their relationship. Armie’s voice begins to crack...Timmy knows this doesn’t happen very often. He listens carefully, knowing it can’t all be good news...

_ A: I told her that I love you Tim. That I have loved you since the day that I met you. I told her I don’t want to pretend that I don't anymore. It felt so good to have this out in the open with her. She asked me if I still love her too. I told her that I do love her for so many beautiful things in our life, but that I feel like she is more of a partner in raising our kids and managing our careers than my romantic love. I told her I need to be authentic to my heart, and with my love and my feelings for you. That hurt her to hear, but the truth needed to be said. I think it was more confirmation in her mind of what she has always known about our relationship, perhaps even before you came into my life. Even though she was very upset as it sunk in, crying, shaking, and wanting to throw me out of the condo immediately, she eventually calmed down. I left her in the bedroom and moved to the couch. This morning she calmly came out and thanked me for finally admitting that I am in love with you, that I have been for years. Then she told me that she still loves me but that in truth she has felt the shift between us over the years too. She also said she wants me to be happy, but that she loves our children, and that she would like us to stay together for them as long as we possibly can. I know this is difficult to hear, but as parents we both agree about keeping the family together. We didn’t discuss how long yet. _

Armie pauses, obviously upset when thinking about the effect on the kids. Timmy feels guilty for what their love will do to those around them.

_ T: Wow Armie. Are you ok? That’s a lot, I’m sorry, I’m sure that was really tough, thank you for doing that for us. I cannot tell you how much this means to me. It helps me. I love you and I love that you did it. For yourself, as much as me. _

_ A: Yeah, I'm ok. I knew in my heart as I was telling her these things that our happiness is worth it. _

_ T: And living your truth is worth it. Don’t ever doubt that. So, I’m not trying to push you, but did you get a chance to tell her about our promise? _

_A: Yeah, I told her that I have committed myself physically to you only, that I want to give you that. That you deserve that at minimum. I told her we are both committing this to each other._

_T: What did she say?_

_A: She took it surprisingly well. I’ve told you, we weren’t really doing much physically anyway since we left Crema. I think the last couple of years it felt like an obligation, you know, to keep up_ _the charade that I still desired her in that way. The new house is big enough we can practically live separately, so I will not share a bedroom with her anymore, Tim. In fact, I want you to have a permanent room there too, if you are ok with that? You can keep whatever you want there. Or at least some of our shared clothes, so I can smell you on me any damn day that I want!_

T: (Timmy covers his ears in jest) _ La la la la la, ok that’s enough talk about what you were doing with her physically since Crema! I don’t want to picture it, I only want to imagine you as mine now. _

_A: Haha, don't worry, all yours now._

_ T: Ok. And thank you again, you have no idea how happy I am that we can at least have that piece of each other, exclusively. I love the idea of having a room in your house if you really think it will work? It seems like an impossibility, but I really love the thought of you sleeping in “my bed” when you miss me. I understand her desire to keep the kids together with you guys. I appreciate what you are doing for us, for me. I really do. I believe that we are one step closer to the whole fucking real thing and I love you man. I love you. I love you. I LOVE YOU. _

Timmy is looking directly into Armie’s eyes, repeating these words. He wants Armie to focus on what this means to him, what these words represent, he wants to fill Armie’s ears and eyes with this connection between them. Armie focuses on Timmy’s lips and eyes, he is the happiest man in the world.

_ A: I love you too. And I am only yours. In body, and mind Timmy. And I cannot wait to show you how much this commitment between us means to me. _

_ T: Mmmmm, God that sounds so good right now Armie. Your mushy side turns me on so fucking much. Can you show me something right now to convince me? I’d give anything to feel how much this means to you... _

_ A: Well, you ARE already naked... how convenient… _

_ T: This is true. Want proof of that, again? _

_A: Ha. Do you have to ask?_

Timmy lifts his phone and aims the camera angle to show his whole torso, but nothing below his hips, teasing Armie.

_A: Lower please_

Armie breathes out slowly, his heavy breath exuding sex. Timmy gives him a little more, a hint of his beautiful cock barely showing on the screen.

_ A: Tim. Lower. Please…you fucking tease _

Armie is whispering, more breath than sound coming from his mouth. Timmy begins to match Armie’s breath.

_T: Like this? Is this what you want to see?_

Timmy gives him a full view, his cock half hard.

He switches the phone to his other hand, uses his free right hand to slowly stroke himself. Armie hisses, Timmy moans.

_A: Fuck, I cannot believe how beautiful you are. Are you getting harder for me Timmy? I want to be your hand...I want you in my mouth_

_ T: Yes babe, this is all for you. Your fucking voice drives me crazy Armie. It's only for you. Show me something. I need to see you. _

_A: I’m on the beach!_

Armie shows Timmy the sand, water, palm trees with a throaty laugh. 

_T: Armand Douglas Hammer, go find a fucking secluded spot right now and show me that big beautiful cock of yours. And I want to see your face staring at my cock when I make myself come. I want to show you how much cum you will have to swallow and share with me the next time we are together._

Armie is way ahead of him. He had slipped into one of the private beach cabanas which has been reserved for his family all week. They are made for privacy and discretion, perfect for this. Armie relaxes. He pulls his shorts down, never taking his eyes off of his lover’s hand stroking his gorgeous pink cock. Now that the ocean has been quieted inside the cabana, Armie can hear Timmy’s soft moans. He lives for these wimpers he discovered in Crema, and has craved them ever since. They are magic to his ears, and his body reacts immediately. Every. Single. Time. He lays himself down on the overstuffed lounge chair, legs falling open. Timmy can tell Armie has found privacy and starts talking again.

_T: Show me your cock. Right now. That’s it baby. Now run your fingers lightly up and down your soft skin. Can you feel me touching you? Stroke yourself gently for me. Can you feel my lips and tongue? I want to taste you from your tip to your hole. I want to suck all of you into my mouth. Taste your sweat, your sweet smell. Can you feel me kissing your entire length? I am going to take all of you in until you hit the back of my throat. Can you help me take it? Push my head down? Can you see my eyes? My love for your cock? I want to suck your juice out of you Armie. I’m so thirsty for you baby._

_A: Yes babe, I feel you, your breath, lips, tongue. Your fucking tongue will be the death of me someday. Mmm, keep talking. You know I love when you are a dirty boy. Put your hand on your neck for me and squeeze._

_ T: Mmmm, I need to see your ass too. Show me your hole. I need to taste you there, use my tongue to open you, make you beg for more, or maybe mercy. Lick your finger and press it into your hole for me. Get your ass wet. I’m going to put my tongue so far in you won’t be able to think, breathe, only beg. _

_ A: Fuck Timmy, my ass is yours baby, I can't wait to feel you there. But I have to top you first next time. I own you. I want your cum to fill the space between us. I am counting on your cum reaching my chin as I fuck you into this next fucking year and leave my cum in you. You are mine. All mine. You belong to me and only me, do you understand? _

These words and visions are too much for Timmy. He has been stroking himself too long. Heard Armie’s voice too long.

_T: Armie. I’m so close. I’m gonna…come. Armie. Fuck. Watch meee..._

_A: Yes baby, please. Come for me. Let it go. Give yourself to me, show me_

_ T: Fuck, Armie! Fuuuuck meeee. Ohh. Fuuuuuuck. Mmmmm _

Timmy releases, with a final loud moan and heavy breathing as he continues to milk himself and come down. Armie’s moans of appreciation help calm Timmy.

_ T: Fuck. God, that felt….incredible. Every. single. time. Armie. Come for me now. Please. Stretch me and fuck me like you promised. Fill me. I want to feel your huge cock abusing my stomach from inside. Show me that you want me, that you own me…. _

_A: Tim….yes, I want you, yes, oh, fuck, oh, fuck, here I…._

Armie’s pace and breath quickens. Timmy’s voice and memories of his tight hole milking Armie’s cock is too much, he cums quickly, violently, his legs and stomach muscles jerking with his cock. His moan and release is enough to make Timmy hard again. They are so in tune with each other. No wonder Liz wants to give up trying to match this physical chemistry.

_ A: Ahhh, Sweet T. Fuck. That felt so good baby. Look what you did, you naughty little peach. _

Armie laughs and shows Timmy an enormous amount of cum on his chest, there is even some on Armie’s neck. Timmy moans, upset he isn’t there to lick him clean with his tongue.

_T: Did we make noise?_

Timmy giggles, Armie moans again and laughs, rubbing the cum off with a nearby towel. They love their former anecdotes and lines from their roles, they will never stop using them. They lay there silently, smiling and catching their breath. Little hums of satisfaction.

_A: I love you T._

_T: I love you more Armie._

_ A: I am yours. Only yours. Forever. _

They admire each other in this sweet afterglow, although Timmy is always a bit embarrassed after Facetime sex. Timmy casually rubs his hand over his neck as he recovers, knowing it is Armie’s favorite sight, he is such a tease. It is Armie’s hand that is usually on Timmy’s neck... promises of pleasure, dominance, just a little choking, just how Timmy likes it. Armie sighs and says…

_A: Please stop doing that for now. I need to get back to the kids. If you keep touching your neck like that I’m never leaving this cabana._

T: _Oh, sorry._ (He snickers, not sorry at all.) _Call me again later tonight? I’m going to need you all to myself again, sir._

_ A: Yes babe, count on it. Have a safe flight to LA later and text me when you land. Check your calendar to talk about dates this month. I told Liz I need to get back to LA soon. I can’t believe you will be on all those red carpets without me. I know we’re both busy but I need to know when I’ll see you in person. Oh, I confirmed my London dates so we can meet up at the end of your London trip after the BAFTAS, but that is too far away. _

_ T: Absolutely babe. I’ll look at dates on the plane. I think I can stick around LA until the second week of January. Come back so you can see me. And it would be great to have Valentine’s Day together in London, wouldn’t it? _

_ A: Ok well if you can stay in LA til I get there I will definitely come back. And yes to Valentine’s Day...we have to make THAT work _

_ T: Can’t wait baby. Think about me as you lie in the hot sun today, okay? Imagine me lying on top of you, with sweat the only thing between us. Well, not the only thing, I guess. _

_A: That is never a problem Timmy, I am never not thinking about you and your body on me. Hiding my erection...now that is a real problem. Happy 2019 baby. It’s going to be a great year for us. Before you go...touch yourself one more time for me._

Timmy laughs and does as he is told. Armie moans when he sees Timmy is already hard again. This kid's stamina is going to kill him someday.

_ A: Mmm Tim, that sight never gets old. Do you understand this means I might need you any time of day, no matter where you are in this huge fucking world? _

_T: Yes Armie. I'll be there for you, for us. Only for you. Sorry that you have to go, but since I have nowhere to be for a couple hours, I’m going to enjoy you again right now...these British GQ pics I took in the changing room are my absolute favs. Turns out I am quite the porn photographer. Ciaoooo, mi amore!_

Timmy puckers and blows a kiss to the phone, laughs and grins huge before he presses end call. It’s a good thing Timmy always ends their calls, because in almost three years now, Armie has never been able to press that red button.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They are finally seeing each other after the New Year's promise. This imagines the party they both attended in LA in January. Thank you Irena for originally posting a pic on IG, a receipt of their reunion. Of course, it wasn't the whole story of the evening. Thanks for sticking with the boys. They are getting there...

Much of January was scheduled with promo obligations for both of them, usually in different cities, and since On the Basis of Sex hadn’t received the critical acclaim and attention like Timmy’s performance in Beautiful Boy had, Armie wasn’t scheduled at any of the red carpet events with Timmy.

They managed to figure out one night in LA where their schedules could overlap before Tim left for Europe if Armie could shorten the Caymans trip. Armie had had enough of the Cayman’s Instagram charade and time with his extended family anyway. Seeing Tim was definitely worth changing their plans. Liz resisted ending their trip earlier than she had wanted, but knowing Liz hates to miss a Hollywood party, he told her they had an invite to a big party at Irena’s they shouldn't miss. She packed them immediately. It wasn’t the ideal place for him to see Tim for the first time since making their New Year’s promise, but Armie realized it was the perfect place for Tim to see Liz. Liz would never cause a scene in front of these Hollywood insiders.

Armie and Liz arrived in LA that afternoon, but Timmy had a Beautiful Boy Q&A to attend so he would meet them at the party. Armie was getting very impatient waiting for Timmy to show up, and he was uncharacteristically nervous. Timmy said he would be there an hour ago. Maybe he chickened out? Armie’s mind buzzed with doubt and all kinds of questions. When he does show up, should he hug him? Pull him aside? Take him into the bathroom and suck his cock?

Armie headed to the bar to get his fourth drink of the night. He wanted to crawl out of his skin, he was so wound up. He was excited to have Timmy at one of these parties he normally hated so much, but where was he? While waiting for his drink, he checked his phone. Nothing. He took his scotch and walked to a quiet spot on the patio to text.

** A: You alive? **

** T: Yeah man, sorry, in Uber now. 11 minutes away **

** A: I was afraid you stood me up **

** T: Never **

** A: Can I hug you when you get here? **

** T: Well that is a stupid question **

** A: You have no idea what I really want to do **

** T: Yes I do. And I guaranfuckingtee my thoughts are worse **

**A: Your honey badger is showing**

** T: Haha. Good**

** A: I remember everything **

** T: Me too. Forever **

** A: I’m sorry I’m making you come to this party. We don’t have to stay long **

** T: Just happy to see you anywhere. How is Liz handling this whole thing tonight **

**A: So far so good. She is of course putting on her show**

** T: I would expect nothing less **

** A: How much longer **

** T: 3 minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! **

** A: It’s been too long T **

** T: I know. I’m almost there **

** A: Ok, I’m going to try and act casual. You’ll laugh when you see what I'm wearing for you **

** T: Such a tease. See you in a sec **

** T: xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxox **

Tim walked in and immediately all heads turned to him. Although most haven’t met him, almost everyone called out “Timmy!” Armie couldn’t help himself and crossed the room in two strides with open arms. He swallowed him up, lifted him off the ground and spun him around. Timmy was giggling when Armie set him down and Armie turned to the crowd, “Hey everybody, it’s Timothee Chalamet!”

Liz wanted damage control and had to be part of the scene so she immediately went to them and hugged Timmy for too long, making sure everyone thought she was his supportive friend and biggest fan. She was cordial of course in front of the party, not wanting anyone to suspect anything had changed between her and Armie, or her and Timmy. Liz was overly attentive to Timmy for a while, which made him uncomfortable, waiting for her real feelings to surface in private. She tried to ignore that it was Armie’s first time seeing Timmy since New Years, and it became obvious she wanted to keep herself between them. She hoped their whole commitment thing had brushed over. She even made Timmy pose for pictures with her and the others like they were one big happy family.

But the night turned sour for her as the drinks flowed and so much attention was focused on Timmy and Armie. Armie never left his side, and with Armie being Armie, he beamed like a proud parent, and stared at Timmy all night. Armie of course was an endless source of Timmy stories, and the party-goers were eating it up. Armie hadn’t been this happy in a long time and observant party guests probably could guess the reason. Liz fumed over the lack of focus on her, and wasn't enjoying everyone fawning over her husband and his “best friend,” who happened to be the hottest thing in Hollywood. She was sure there were whispers about the undeniable connection between Armie and Timmy as well, which put her over the edge.

"Armie, can I speak to you, alone?" Liz interrupted them. Timmy pretended not to hear her to give them some space, and he turned to speak to another guest. Liz grabbed Armie's arm and pulled him out to the patio, smiled at the guests she passed as she did, trying to make her pulling seem playful.

"You promised me you wouldn't embarrass me in public. But you can't take your fucking eyes off of him. I am still your wife. You need to fucking act like it."

"Liz, I haven't seen Tim in a month. I told you how this is going to be. I haven't done anything to embarrass you. People know that Tim and I are close, and they obviously all love him. If you aren't comfortable, you have a choice. You can either stay or go."

"And leave you here alone with him? No Armie, you don't get to have your cake and eat it too. You're stuck with me tonight, we are here together. Timmy wasn’t even invited."

Armie at this point was pretty buzzed and decided that was enough. He walked away and said over his shoulder, “You know what Liz, I've never really liked your cake. Have a great night."

Armie rejoined the party, found Tim and showed him the Uber he requested for them was 1 min away. They said quick goodbyes to the hosts, Timmy accepting their invitation to come over the next time he was in town, at their insistence. Armie made a joke about Timmy not being LA’s newest party trick which made the whole circle of friends laugh. Timmy smiled and followed him out the door, excited that Armie had claimed him again.

As the Uber pulled up, Timmy worried. "Hey, is everything ok? Why did we leave so quickly?"

"Yeah, I'm just ready to have you to myself." Armie said in his gentle but sexy voice as he reached for the door handle with their faces just inches apart.

Inside the Uber, their 30ish driver named Joey with a thick NY accent recognized Armie immediately. "Armie Hammer?! I thought that was you man! Wow! You're huge in person. Damn, you got enough room back there?"

"I get that a lot, and yes, Im fine, thanks." Tim is laughing next to him.

"So… it says we’re headed to the Sunset Tower Hotel, huh? Ok. Want me to take you around to the private entrance? Like the other movie stars?” Armie smiled as Timmy's leg hit excitedly tapped Armie's. Timmy had assumed they would be headed to Armie's house or Tim's hotel, not their special place.

“No, the front is fine. Thanks man.”

“Man, I loved you in The Lone Ranger, I don't know why everyone hated it. Tonto was weird though...like was he supposed to be funny? Hey...you gonna be Batman? I heard you are, which would be awesome!"

Armie laughs, "Thanks man, my career isn't dead yet, but no, I am not Batman."

Armie's phone buzzes with texts. The driver is going on and on with thoughts about Armie as Batman. Armie is half listening but opens his phone.

** Liz: That's really mature Armie, leaving me here alone. Wtf? Again, remember you are MARRIED. Watch yourself in public. Remember your children. **

** Timmy: Haha, You’re HUGE! If he only knew... **

** T: So glad no one knows me yet. This guy has no idea who I am. Or that you sucked my dick, “on film” **

Armie ignores Liz. Responds to Timmy's.

** A: LOL! Why are you texting me? Im sitting right next to you. **

** A: And yes, I did. Off film too ;p **

** T: Because I like hearing this guy praise you. Don't want to interrupt. Man he can talk. **

** T: Can’t wait for you to do it again **

** T: You look so fucking sexy right now **

** A: Watch it T **

** T: Watch what? He can admire u but i can't? **

** A: Wait til I get my hands on u **

** T: I’m so fucking excited we are headed to Sunset and not your house **

** A: With only one night, we need privacy **

** A: And no kids **

** T: Our regular suite? **

** A: Of course **

** T: I'm ordering my fav mac and cheese **

** A: It can wait **

** T: Why? **

** A: You know why **

** T: But I'm hungry **

** A: I have something better for you to eat **

** T: Mmm, I can taste you already **

Tim decides the back seat is dark enough and boldly slides his hand into Armie's lap. He finds Armie's half hard cock and gives him a playful squeeze. The driver had fully explained why Armie needs to be Batman and why Affleck was an awful choice, and was now asking if he had a Batman suit fitting yet. Armie and Timmy just laughed and Timmy couldn't help himself, "They are going to need a lot of rubber. He will be the biggest Batman yet!" The whole car busts out laughing. 

"Oh, here we are guys. Sorry I talked your ear off! Nice to meet you Batman. I'm not giving up hope!"

"Thanks man, don't hold your breath."

Armie and Timmy climbed out of the car, laughing at how ridiculous that whole ride was. Armie adjusted his pants and gave Tim a look.

"What?" Tim recognized the look but played coy.

"You're mine now, T." Timmy grinned wide and followed him inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, some real reunion privacy in the next chapter. Coming SOON. Thanks for reading.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long one, but hopefully enjoyable. Fiction, of course!?

Tim kept his head down as they walked through the lobby. Tim ducked into the men's room and Armie headed to the restaurant, walked into the kitchen, nodded to the kitchen staff and found the room service elevator. His generous tipping of the staff has paid off immensely these last two years.

After about 5 minutes, Timmy headed to the regular lobby elevator. He rose to their floor and walked down the corridor to the end of the hall. He knocked once, and before he took a full inhale, trying to calm his nerves, the door opened. 

"Get in here" Armie's voice was playful but fueled.

Armie grabbed Tim by the waist and quickly pushed him against the foyer wall with his whole body. Their lips desperate to find each other. The kiss was passionate and frenzied. Each one tried to show how much they had missed this, how much their promise meant. 

As Armie's hands searched for access to Tim's skin, Timmy suddenly stopped Armie, grabbed his hands and held them to his chest. "Wait. Look at me."

"I'm trying to see more of you."

Timmy laughed. "I need to say something."

"Right now? You ok? Isn't this ok?"

"Yes, of course. I'm so happy." Timmy kisses him again to reassure him. “I just.”

"Tim, it has been torture waiting for this." Armie still kissing his cheeks, neck, chin.

Tim kisses Armie softly back but pulls away again before Armie takes control.

"I just need to thank you in person for what you are doing for us. I felt the difference tonight, being in the same room with you and Liz. I want you to know it means everything to me, and I love you even more than I thought was possible."

"You don't need to thank me Timmy. I should thank you for being patient, I know we aren't totally there yet." Armie kissed him again, pushed his hips tight against Tim again.

“No, we’re not there yet, but I trust we will get there. You really are only mine, right? I know what you are going through to make me the priority. I will never forget what you are doing for me. For us." Tim put his arms under Armie’s shirt, rubbed his palms flat on his back and pulled him tighter to him.

"Yes Tim. I am yours. Only." Armie kissed Tim again, slowly, deeply, intimately, answered his question even further. He moved his hands from Tim's jaw and throat to his hips and slowly pulled him into the room, towards their bed. "Can I show you how much I've missed your body now? Facetime isn't this fucking sexy." 

"Yes, please." 

Tim smiled as Armie took off Tim's jacket. Tim watched his fingers find their way under his shirt, slowly lifting it up and over Tim's head. The sight of Tim's perfect skin was too much.  


Armie kissed Tim's neck, collarbone, shoulder, chest, licked his nipples, then knelt to cover his stomach with kisses, fingers and thumbs. His tongue and fingers traced along the edge of Tim's pants. Armie looked up at Tim and saw the dark desire in Tim's eyes, permission was granted. He unbuttoned his pants, so pleased to find Tim had gone without underwear for him.  


He let the pants fall to the floor, and stared into Tim's eyes again. Tim looked so beautiful.  


"God I've missed you. Your skin. Everything."  


"I need you Armie." Tim grabbed his hair and pulled Armie toward his cock.  


Armie understood. His mouth found Tim and lavishly sucked, kissed, fondled him. Tim was already hard and hissed like he was touched by fire, but Armie had to taste him before he took him completely. He coaxed precum onto his tongue, moaned at the quenching of his thirst. He pulled off before Tim lost it completely.  


Armie stood and kissed Tim, giving him a taste of his first juices, then slowly lowered him onto the bed. Without breaking eye contact, Armie pulled off his own shirt. He reached into his pocket and pulled a small bottle of lube out and threw it on the bed next to Tim. He undid his pants, let them fall, and efficiently kicked them away.

Timmy rose up and reached for Armie's cock. Armie let Tim stroke him a few times but then climbed to completely straddle Tim, grabbed his hands and put them over Tim's head. "But I want to touch you." Tim protested

"No no no baby. Keep your hands up here. I'm going to take care of you tonight. You can make requests, but I want you to relax and I'll give you what you need. I'm yours, completely. Do you understand?"  


Tim nods and in his softest voice said, "I need you inside me Armie. I need us to be connected in the deepest way. It has been too long since I felt you there. Please."  


“I know baby. I want that too, and I will fuck you soon. But I need to see all of you first. Your skin is so fucking gorgeous. How is it getting softer and more beautiful every time I see you? And your smell, God I could live in this spot right here.” Armie was inhaling in Tim’s curls, between his jaw and shoulder. He then held himself above Tim and moved to kiss his whole body again. He covered every inch with his lips and breath. Tim would leave for Europe tomorrow with no doubt of Armie’s devotion to him. 

"Please, Armie, inside me. I….I’m begging you."

Armie grabbed a pillow, lifted Timmy's hips and slipped it under Tim. Timmy hummed, loving the angle and the anticipation. Armie found the lube and poured it onto his fingers. He shifted to the end of the bed and lifted and bent Timmy's legs to lay them open, asking Tim if he was comfortable. Armie's mouth found Tim's cock again as his fingers slid from his shaft slowly down to his sweet spot. Tim moaned, and Armie melted at the sound. 

Armie circled Timmy’s rim, gently and slow, he didn't want to hurt Tim since it had been a while since he had breached Timmy's most vulnerable spot. Armie licked and kissed him there too, through Tim's moans.

"Armie, please, fill me. Put them in. I'm not going to last long tonight."

"You want me in your ass Timmy? Like this? Armie inserted his middle finger, it slides in easier than he expected without Tim resisting. Tim hissed, but immediately begged for more. "Mmm, my spot Armie, oh fuuuuck, yesss. My favorite. More. Please."

Armie happily obliged, sticking his index finger in. Now moving and pressing fingers within him, he watched Tim's face for signs of distress. He saw only pleasure. 

"More. Please. Mmm, fuck that's so good baby. Oh God, you know my body."

“Because I own your body. You want more? Can you take more? Careful baby, don’t come.”

Armie added his ring finger. Timmy moaned louder, panting, Armie knows he will come soon if he keeps going. After a few more circles inside Timmy, avoiding his prostate to avoid pushing him over the edge, he pulled his fingers out and squeezed Tim at the base of his cock to still the sensations. Tim moaned, "Armie, please, now. I'm ready. Please fuck me. I've waited too long."

Armie hovered over him, generously coated himself in lube and lined up his cock to Timmy's entrance. "Stop me if you need to. Promise?"

"I promise."

"And keep your hands over your head, I've got you. You are mine."

Timmy tilted his hips even more to push his hole against the tip of Armie's cock. Armie smiled, grabbed onto Tim’s legs and pushed slightly into Tim. Tim exhaled, "Fuck. Yes. Yes, keep going." Tim was reaching for headboard to brace himself.

Armie pushed his whole head in, paused, leaned down and kissed Tim. Tim breathed into Armie's mouth a few times to relax his muscle and said “Keep going, I’m fine.” Armie slowly pushed again, now fully seated. Fully connected. Armie paused, letting the sensation live in both of them.

"God you fill me perfectly Armie. Fuck I’ve missed this. I want this to last forever. Can you fuck me slowly?"  


Tim's words were such a turn on. To see him this way and hear the words “fuck me slowly” “fill me perfectly” “keep going” “I’ve missed this” come out of Timmy’s mouth is the most powerful drug Armie has ever known. There will never be another person or love or body or feeling like this for him.  


After a few more moments of stillness, Armie moved his hips, cautiously pulling out to the edge as Tim whimpered at the loss and pushing back in as slowly as he could. Tim accepted him fully...heart, mind, body, and they felt more connected than ever before.  


Armie reached and interlaced his left hand with Timmy's hands above him as he pushed into him, eyes tethered to each other. It felt like Armie looked directly into Tim’s soul, and while their bodies were in complete surrender to each other, tears filled their eyes as their pleasure intensified.

"I love you, Tim. Fuck, you're so incredible."

"Mmm, I love you, Armie, and not just for this."

Armie moved his hands to Tim's head and held it tight as he continued to push into him. He kissed his lips, jaw, nose.  


They fucked slowly, one full breath per thrust for a few minutes. Armie never let go of Tim's head, Timmy broke the rules and ran his fingers through Armie's hair and down his back, wanting to encourage every press into him, his cock getting the most delicious rub between their sliding bodies.  


Timmy could sense Armie was reaching his edge by his moans. "Come inside me."  


"You sure you're ready?"  


"Yes. Come. So ready."

Armie lifted his chest slightly to wrap a hand around Tim. He tilted his hips and fucked slightly harder into Timmy while he stroked him. Tim breathed quicker, making the dirtiest fucking sounds while Armie took control of their bodies, pulling Tim and thrusting simultaneously.  


"Armie, fuck, your cock feels so good. Fuck me harder. I'm so close."  


"Mmm, come baby. You feel so fucking good. Come for me. Fuuuuck.”  


After one more thrust, Armie came inside Tim and Tim exploded onto his chest with long ribbons of cum. When Armie exhausted himself, Tim pulled Armie down flat on him, not wanting him to move or pull out. If he could, he would die this way someday, being crushed by Armie. After a minute of kissing, moaning and more “I love yous”, Armie reached to grab Timmy’s t-shirt and attempted to clean their chests and cocks between them.  


Timmy coaxed Armie to lay back down on him. Their breath slowed and completely synchronized as they came back to earth. Armie had shifted to Tim’s side, with his leg covering Timmy’s cock, not willing to lose contact there. Armie stroked Tim’s entire body, tracing lines that Tim would try to feel long after Armie was away from him again.  


When they were apart, Tim used pillows and his own fingers running up and down his skin to replicate Armie on him like this, but nothing could ever feel as warm and safe as Armie’s skin, body and fingertips. He even ordered a weighted blanket for his apartment in NYC, but nothing felt like Armie in the flesh.  


Armie was pleased that Tim was completely relaxed and he had seduced him into a light sleep, but he could not stand the thought of sleeping during the last hours they had together.  


Armie slid off of the bed and ordered Timmy’s mac and cheese, a filet, medium rare, truffle fries, and a nice Barolo wine while Timmy napped.  


Armie showered himself off quickly, ran hot water over a soft washcloth and brought it with a dry towel to their bed. He slowly cleaned Timmy’s chest, neck, stomach, legs and finally his beautiful cock. Tim gradually woke up and moaned, savoring the attention. The warm cloth followed by Armie drying him felt like heaven. In his half-sleep, he thought he was dreaming when he felt the sensations, but opened his eyes to find Armie staring at every inch of his body as he touched him. “Mmmm, that feels so good. I’m cold, can you cover me?”

Armie immediately laid his entire body on top of Tim to warm him. Tim was in his happiest place, taking Armie’s full weight on top of him. “Mmm, that’s better.” Armie lifted to his elbows to give Tim’s lungs some breathing room and kissed his chest, his chilled nipples, his collarbone. “I ordered room service, it'll be here soon.”

“You better put some clothes on then to answer the door because I don’t think I can move. Can I hide under the covers?”

Armie kisses him again. "Of course baby, I've got it."

"Thanks for taking care of me. You're spoiling me." 

"Well, I love you Tim. I would do this every day if I could."

“Mmm, that sounds nice. I love you too Armie. Pour la vie.” Tim lifted his head to meet Armie’s lips. They get carried away with these words, it is the kiss of a lifetime, again.  


When there is time, and there is privacy, they kiss like it’s the last time. After a few minutes of devouring each other and erections colliding, almost bringing them to their edges, there is a knock on the door.  


“Shit! Where’s a robe?” Armie laughed and jumped up and found one on the hook in the bathroom. Luckily it is thick enough terry cloth to hide his enormous hard on. Tim smiled as he heard the door open with Armie’s boisterous and friendly greeting, making friends everywhere he goes of course.  


“No need to bring the food in, I’ve made a mess in here. I’ll just take the cart, thanks man. Yeah, I'm sure, thanks. no worries. Here you go, have a great night.”  


Armie came back into the bedroom with a robe for Tim. “C’mon, let’s eat out on the couch, I can’t be on the bed without wanting to eat you.” Timmy laughed and let Armie put his robe on. Timmy reached for the robe tie but Armie swatted his hands away. “Uh uh uh….no need for that. At least give me a little dinner with a view.”  


Armie opened the wine and poured two glasses. Timmy remembered sharing this wine many times in Italy at Luca's. Armie handed Tim a glass with a serious look on his face. “To the only person in this world that allows me to be the person I want to be.”

Timmy’s eyes start to water. This sentiment is so raw for Armie and Timmy knows what it means deep down for him to say those words. It is the biggest compliment he could give him.

“Don’t cry Sweet T. Just drink!” Armie took a drink and followed it with a kiss, tasting the wine between them with fond memories of Italy, never far from their minds.  


As Armie pulled away, Timmy drank again with a silent toast he kept to himself. He needed to swallow his emotions this time since their time was ticking away. Armie sensed his thoughts as he kept his eyes on him, Tim cannot hide anything.  


They moved the coffee table out of the way and put the room service cart next to the couch. Tim sat with his back against one end, Armie on the other, their legs stretched out and intertwined. Armie’s legs are so long he tucked his feet under Tim’s hips, which Tim loved of course.

Tim moaned happy moans as he ate his favorite mac and cheese, leaning forward to feed some to Armie. Armie cut Tim bites of his steak as well, both thoroughly enjoying the food, wine, physical contact and joking that comes so easily between them. Armie had some good Caymans ocean stories he needed to tell Tim. After laughing so hard their mouths hurt, Tim gave Armie the last bite and set the bowl down. 

“Mmm, that tastes so fucking good. God, to be young again and be able to eat carbs like you...I’m so fucking jealous.” Tim laughed and teased back, “Well I can't eat them like I used to, but you’ll always love my little Eli Belly.” 

Armie set his drink on the cart and moved forward to kiss Tim’s belly, his belly button, his sides, his lovely trail of dark hair leading down to his cock. “Yes, this adorable, little, squishy at times belly is all mine. I’m still pissed at Felix. I’m still really not over it.”

Tim laid back, enjoying Armie’s attention to his body. Armie quickly dropped his attention to Tim’s half-hard cock, smiled up at Tim. “This is all I really need… no carbs, just protein.”

Tim laughed and moaned as Armie’s lips, tongue and hand began to stroke him, quickly becoming fully hard, precum oozing out. Armie took his full length in and slowly bobbed from base to tip. Tim held Armie’s head in place, keeping the pace slow. He wanted this feeling and view to last until his flight in the morning, but who was he kidding. He was lucky to get a few minutes of this pleasure before completely losing it. 

Armie watched Tim’s face while he sucked him. Giving Tim pleasure was the most satisfying physical sensation Armie had experienced in years. It always surpassed his own needs. 

The beautiful sounds coming from both of them unconsciously forced Armie to speed up his sucking. Tim thrusted into his mouth in unison with Armie’s movements, wanting and chasing the end but wishing it wouldn’t come so damn fast. Timmy tapped Armie’s cheek to let him know he was coming, which just fueled Armie on, wanting to absorb and swallow every drop. 

As Tim let go, Armie held and squeezed his balls, milking everything out of Tim into his mouth. Tim's body relaxed and he caught his breath while Armie licked his way up to Tim’s mouth. They shared his cum. When the taste subsided, Armie sat back against his end of the couch, took a sip of wine with a smile. Tim was in a haze as he watched Armie. Armie is the most beautiful man he has ever seen, how is he real, Tim thought as he rejoined the conscious world. 

After a few minutes of silence and loving gazes, they talked about Timmy’s upcoming Europe schedule. Tim mentioned his invitation to Virgil’s fashion show which he was pinching himself about. Virgil had texted to personally invite him, told him Ocean would be there too. 

They talked about the BAFTAs and how much fun they had there last year together. Their two-person private after party in their hotel room was one they would never forget. They reminisced about the outstanding weed someone had given them that night. 

They talked about Valentine’s Day. Timmy got quiet when Armie reminded him that Liz was coming along for the On The Basis of Sex premiere and press events there. Both of them rolled their eyes at this information. Tim could have protested, but didn't want to ruin this bliss.  


“I can extend my London stay, but then I have to be in Paris early on the 14th.”  


“Well, I want every minute I can get with you. I’ll clear my schedule as early as possible on the 13th. And I will try to be alone as soon as you're available.”  


Tim looked at him with doubt in his eyes. “How are you going to manage that?”  


“I promise you Tim, things are going to be different. You will see. I will prove it to you.”  


With this, Tim moved forward and laid down on Armie's chest in silence, his hand and fingers lightly skimmed Armie's sides, arms and of course traced the sexiest path between his thigh and groin. Armie kissed Tim's hair, fingers running through his beautiful, luscious curls.  


Tim scooted down until his mouth was in line with Armie's cock. The heat from his breath was enough to excite Armie again. Tim began to stroke and lick him, happy to watch Armie grow so easily for him. He sucked him in while staring up at Armie. Armie guiding his head slowly, up and down.  


Armie always checked back his desire to fuck Tim's mouth harder than he thought Tim could take him. It is difficult being as big as Armie, but Tim has proven over and over again that he worships his huge cock and always takes it deeper than Armie thinks he should. Tim's choking sounds excite yet worry Armie. Timmy looks up to reassure him he loves it, and lives for this.  


Tim knows Armie loves it rough and dirty so he speeds up his pace. He is sucking and jerking Armie feverishly, his other hand bracing him on Armie's chest. He hummed to increase the sensation on Armie and Armie warns him. "Tim, fuck, I'm coming."

Tim smiles and sucks harder and faster, he milks Armie's cock for every drop of cum, moaning with his own satisfaction as his mouth fills and he swallows the warm, bitter liquid. He loves this man. He wants to carry his seed inside him in his mouth, throat, stomach and veins, as he flies to Europe without him tomorrow. 

Armie firmly grabbed Tim's upper arms and pulled him up into a deep kiss. Timmy is spent and lays his head down on Armie's chest again. Timmy hums as he snuggled his head under Armie's chin. Tim closes his eyes to focus on the smell of Armie's neck and the feel of his arms around him. Heaven.

Their bodies became slack and both drifted off for a little sleep, melting into each other easily. 

As morning light came into their suite, Tim opened his eyes and squinted, lifted himself a bit to look around for a clock. The realization that their time together was quickly ending hit him hard, and he tried to blink back the tears but couldn't help them from starting again. Armie felt them on his chest as he woke up. He hugged Tim tightly to him.  


“I will see you soon in London. We will talk and text everyday until then. It’s going to be ok Tim.” Armie tried to reassure him.  


“I know, I just can’t help the sadness sometimes. I hate this.”  


Timmy crawled off of him and began to get dressed. Armie smiled as Tim grabbed Armie’s shirt and put it on, then his clothes from the night before over it. “What am I going to wear home?” Armie asked.  


“I don’t know man, but all I know is that this is mine now.” Timmy teased.  


“Fine, but hey, I want our sweater back when I see you in London. Can you wear it a lot between now and then and bring it to me?”  


“Of course baby.” Timmy leaned down to Armie and kissed him deeply. Armie grabbed Tim’s head, ears, curls, holding him tightly as they melted into each other again. Timmy hissed and pulled away before he undressed and attacked Armie again.

“Stop, we can’t start this. I have to go get my stuff from my hotel and get to the airport soon.”

“Let’s Uber to my car and I’ll drive you. It will give me a few more minutes with you. Alone.” Armie smiled, and it was exactly what Timmy had hoped Armie would say. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of their story, for now. It starts after their night together on January 12, 2019, and jumps to the day after the BAFTA awards in London, back to where our story began. Again, it's fiction, but I included real life events as much as possible. Thank you for reading. I hope you have enjoyed it!

The ride to the airport was quiet and the conversation felt strained. Armie tried to lighten the mood but Timmy fell into a bad place, anticipating not being able to see Armie for a month. Armie asked Tim a lot of questions about his schedule for the next few days so they could plan some Facetime calls. Tim answered him and tried to feign happiness, but the sad tone of his voice was obvious to Armie.

“Timmy, the distance is tough on both of us, but I promise we will be ok. We’ve been doing this for a couple of years and my love for you has only grown. Have a little faith in us, and in me, ok?” Armie says as he pushes Timmy’s shoulder teasingly. “Hey, I cannot let you get out of this car without a real Timmy smile.”

“Pull over.”

“Right here?”

“Right here.”

Armie looked and found what looked like a closed business with an empty parking lot and pulled in. Timmy unbuckled his seat belt and climbed over to sit on Armie’s lap. Armie mentally thanked God for his huge front seat and tinted windows.

Timmy immediately wrapped his arms around Armie’s neck and put his face into Armie's neck, not wanting him to see his eyes.

Armie’s hands found the sides of Tim’s head and lifted him so he could see his face.

“Hey hey hey. It's ok. Tim. Look at me.” Tim’s eyes continued to look down, he tried to pull away from Armie’s hands and put his face back into his neck.

“Tim.” Armie pulled him back up and found his lips instead. He kissed gently, first lips, then cheeks, eyelids, made his way around Timmy’s face. Timmy’s eyes remained focused on Armie’s chest. Armie tried to coax him to receive the kisses. Tim pulled back and looked Armie in the eyes. Armie tried to chase his lips but Tim turned his head to avoid the contact.

“I’m trying really hard to not be sad, Armie, and I’m sorry that I am. I’m sorry that I can’t hide it from you. I’m sorry that I don’t want to be away from you again. I’m sorry I don’t want to think about you in your house with her. I’m sorry I don’t want to see your happy family on my IG feed all fucking day. I’m sorry I am this way, but I can’t help it. If my feelings are too much for you to deal with, I understand, and I will have to accept that the situation isn't able to change anytime soon and I will leave you alone.”

“Tim, of course I don’t want you to be sad, but I for fucking sure don’t want you to be sorry for feeling the way you do. I wish I could wave a wand and erase my marriage, but I can’t.”

“And I would never want you to do that. Your family is part of you, and I fell in love with all of you.”

“And I love you, forever Tim. I cannot imagine losing you. I don’t know what else to say that we don’t already know.”

“Just let me be sad, Armie. I will be fine, just like I always am, I just can’t let myself think too much. It’s just so hard to say goodbye and my thoughts start spinning.”

Armie pulled Tim to his chest and held him tight for a few minutes in silence. 

“I better go.” Tim lifted his chest. He lifted his hands to Armie’s scruffy face and kissed him deeply. “Remember this, and me, please.”

“I remember everything, Tim. Always.”

Timmy kissed him again, then moved back to his seat. Armie put his hand on Timmy’s thigh as they continued their drive to LAX. Timmy talked about their flight to Rome together a year earlier, and Armie reminded him that the hotel in Rome was a lot more fun to remember, always there for each other when they needed it most. "Ok I’ll try to focus on that when I’m freaking out over the ocean without you holding my hand.” 

They pulled up to the curb. Timmy turned to look at Armie and he smiled, genuinely. Armie could see it in his eyes. “Is this better?”

“Yes baby, keep that smile for me and Facetime me when you land.”

"I will. Thanks for last night. It was incredible." Timmy looked at Armie's lips, so badly wanted to kiss them, but there were people everywhere around the car.

Armie leaned toward Tim and pulled him into a tight hug. Tim reached for him too and kissed his neck while he had the chance.

“Til next time Sweet T. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Tim put his headphones on, pulled his hoodie up and put his sunglasses on and quickly exited the car. He grabbed his bag out of the back and gave Armie a silent peace sign as he closed the door and walked away. Armie watched as Timmy walked toward the terminal. Tim turned around and and gave him one more peace sign, looking to see if Armie was watching him. Armie could tell his face was sad and his heart sank in his chest. Armie bit the inside of his cheek to keep the tears away as he watched Timmy disappear behind the sliding doors. 

____________________________________________

The daily facetime calls, constant texting and sexting had kept the lovers full of promise until their next rendezvous. Timmy’s lack of self-confidence forced him to ask about the promise every few days, just to make sure Armie was keeping his end of the deal. Asking about the promise and the underlying question of physical contact lead to constant desire for each other, resulting in more intense Facetime sex sessions, almost everyday.

Time seemed to go so slowly at the end of January and early February while they were apart. Tim needed to get to France to start the shooting of the French Dispatch, but as promised, he was able to extend his London stay for a couple days to overlap Armie’s press tour in London.

What seemed like a good idea a few weeks ago, now was causing major anxiety for Timmy since their time together in London would be so short again. After their time together in January, it took Tim a week to feel better after leaving Armie in LA. And to make things worse, Liz was coming to London of course, to keep up the image of a happy marriage. The plan was to go out with each other for dinner on the 13th, with Liz along for the dinner for appearances sake, and then they would discreetly share a hotel suite that night. Timmy had to fly to France the next morning, Valentine’s Day.

Timmy knew that major heartache was coming as they had so little time before Timmy would disappear for months of shooting Wes' movie and then Dune. Armie assured him one night was better than nothing, even with Liz there for a portion of it, and he promised to make it up to him as soon as possible.

It was Sunday, February 10th, and Tim was feeling anxious with the BAFTA awards that night, and it had been a tough few days since they had only managed a few texts since Thursday. He had been busy with some fundraiser events and Timmy’s schedule was crazy too.

They finally were able to connect in the afternoon, Armie had called him and immediately began begging to see what he was going to wear. True to form, Timmy kept changing the subject.

“Just make sure I can see something I’ve given you, Tim. Let me know I’m there with you.”

“You’re always with me Armie. And be sure to look at my feet too.”

“Ooh a hint, I love it. I can’t wait to attack you on Wednesday. It’s finally here. We made it, again.”

“Mmm, I can’t wait for that. I’m free by 6 pm.”

“Good. I am disappointed our teams are making us do this dinner thing, but I guess it’s better than nothing. I have our suite reserved, and I’m bringing a couple surprises for you.”

“Hmm, should I be worried?”

“Not unless you have a problem with my kinky rope fetish and my desire to bind you so tight you can still feel the restraints when you leave me for the next five months? It is Valentine’s Day you know. Is it wrong of me to want to cover you in love marks?”

“Oh boy, I’m definitely worried.” Timmy laughed.

“I need your skin, your body, everything Tim... it’s been too long. Less than three days now and I cannot fucking wait. Have fun tonight, but not too much fun without me. Save some energy for Wednesday, you’re gonna need it”

“Ok, I promise to be a good boy. I’ll call you in the morning. Brian is going to be here any minute, I better get dressed.”

“I’ll be anxiously waiting to see you… give the camera the Timmy Chalamet sexiest fucking stare in the world again, ok? I’ll be waiting for it.”

“Ok mon amour. Mmwah!”

______________________________

(We are back to the day after the BAFTA’s, February 11th where our story began. Tim and Armie finally connected through Facetime but the conversation has not gone well and Tim has hung up on Armie, still suffering after seeing the two online videos of Armie and Liz that surfaced from the weekend.)

It takes Armie a minute to realize Timmy has ended the Facetime call. God dammit. Those fucking videos. He quickly places another Facetime call. Timmy answers on the last possible ring.

_ A: Timmy, please, don’t fucking hang up on me. I cannot get on this fucking plane to London tomorrow night without knowing we are ok. Do not get off the phone with me like this. Dammit, those videos mean nothing! The promise is still in tact. I cannot wait to see you in London. Please, don’t do this to us. To me. I am begging you, Tim. _

Silence, from both of them. Hard to find words today that help.

Timmy breaks the silence.

_ T: I need time. Give me that. I really need to dig deep here Armie. Decide if I can live with our arrangement any longer. I already know how I’m going to feel when you leave me behind in our suite Thursday morning to have your public Valentine’s Day PR bullshit with her. These videos are starting my heartbreak before I even see you! Please don't call or text me. Please respect my need right now to think. _

Armie's heart drops as his phone goes black. He hung up again. Armie's phone vibrates again a moment later with a text.

** T: Just know that I love you, and I’m sorry I need time. Not sure I can stand the heartbreak. I wish I was stronger. Sometimes I wish I didn’t love you. **

God dammit Timmy, Armie thinks. Armie texts him back because he has to tell him, he cannot let it go.

** A: But you do love me, and I love you too. Please don't make me be silent. Please see me in London. I’ve waited so long to see you and hold you, if you don’t see me it will kill me. **

**T: Please, just don't say anything else. I’ll let you know if I can handle seeing you. And Liz hanging all over you for the restaurant and the Instagram world to see **

Ouch, that last sentence hurts Armie through his heart. He knows Timmy deserves more from him, but these London arrangements were the best he could do.

Armie puts down his phone and drives home, replaying these conversations over and over in his mind. He is worried about Timmy’s state of mind and can’t bear the thought that Timmy might not see him there, he has literally fantasized about seeing him this week every single day since Armie took Timmy to the airport in LA.

To make things worse, Liz is pissed and ready to yell at him when he walks back in the door. Armie is distraught and his head is somewhere else when she starts to rant.

“I thought you promised to watch the kids while I was on my call? How can you watch the kids speeding away in your car, Armie? Are you a responsible Dad, or not?!”

“Don’t start with me Elizabeth. I’m sorry. I had to make an urgent phone call. I knew you were here. Sometimes my life is a priority too. I see you’re off your call. I’m going to go workout and then pack for London."

“Wait, before you storm off, I just got a call about the London schedule. I know you are planning to see Tim on Wednesday. I spoke to the PR teams and we are busy until about 8 pm, so I guess we can have a late dinner with Timothee then. The plan is to be seen all together and then they want us to post a photo, which given the developments of the last couple of months, I’m not excited about but I will do it, for your career Armie because that is the kind of person I am.

“Always the martyr, aren’t you, Elizabeth? Remind me again why you are coming to London? Anyway, our PR teams need to check with Timmy to make sure he still wants to have dinner. And regardless of dinner plans, I have arranged a different place to stay that evening, just so you know. I would prefer you not ask me too many questions about it, and that you don’t make Timmy uncomfortable during our dinner, if he comes to dinner. I’m sure with the paparazzi around, I trust you will be on your best behavior and remember our arrangement.”

“Why would he not want to have dinner? And why can’t you just ask him about it directly in one of your fifty calls and texts to him today? I thought he would be dying to see you? Ohhh. Is there trouble in lovers' paradise?”

“Stop it. You knew those public videos would cause problems for me. Never again, I don’t give a shit what the circumstances are, do not grab me and try to kiss me like that ever again.”

“Oh Armie, you silly boy….you know our PR teams will post and leak anything they can about our loving marriage. I’m not the one you need to worry about at this point.”

“Well you better hope Timmy recovers from this and wants to see me. If he doesn’t, I’m going to end this whole charade once and for all. Those videos were your fault, don’t pretend otherwise.”

She walks away with a huff, and Armie heads to the gym.

Thank goodness Nick has arrived to take care of the kids, since Elizabeth always has more important things to do, like another facial. One look at Armie and he knows not to ask what’s going on. Nick has known Armie longer than anyone else around him, and he trusts him completely. Armie confided in Nick about the promise after returning from the Caymans. He doubted Armie’s ability to keep peace at home with the new arrangement...so walking in on this fight reaffirms Nick’s expectations. He feels sorry for them both and is determined to be a good friend to them and their children whom he adores.

Armie takes out some frustrations at the gym. His trainer is building his muscle mass for an upcoming role, and of course his improved conditioning has been plastered all over the internet with speculation about why he is bulking up. Timmy would often call as soon as a new gym pic surfaced...demanding Armie find a secluded spot immediately to satisfy Timmy’s desire to see his body for himself.

He would always say “Who are you building this stronger, sexier body for, Armie?” Armie would reply “For you, Timmy. It is all for you. Only you.” He was excited for Timmy to see the changes in his body in person in a couple days, but now with that in question, sadness takes over the adrenaline and his workout doesn’t give him the boost it has in the last couple of weeks.

He leaves the gym and goes for a drive along the coast. Without realizing it, he drives into the Hollywood hills toward the quiet spot overlooking the ocean that they found the day of the GQ shoot. Timmy brings it up often to Armie, says it’s now his favorite place in LA, says it belongs to them. It warms Armie’s heart to hear him say it, knowing Tim likes to think about that special day. Memories of Monet’s berm always flood in with that comment as well. Armie daydreams about other places in the world they can make their own someday.

Armie pulls off the road, gets out and walks to the cliff’s edge. His clothes are soaked from sweat so the breeze feels even cooler than normal and he shivers, missing Timmy by his side even more. As memories flood in of he and Timmy in this spot, the sadness works its way even deeper into his chest. Tears fill Armie’s eyes. Feelings of helplessness, fear, anxiety.

He says out loud, into the wind "Timmy, please text me. Please call me." He is begging and willing it into the universe.

A stronger breeze kicks up, and just as Armie is too cold and upset to stay in their spot any longer, his phone buzzes in his pocket.

Incoming Facetime call from Sweet T. Armie believes in God and the power of the universe after all..

_A: Hi. Thank God you called back._

Armie speaks quietly, wipes tears away as he looks at Timmy’s beautiful face. He thinks he sees tears in Timmy’s eyes too.

_ A: I'm sure you have something to say, but real quick, look where I am… _

Armie flips the screen so Timmy can see Timmy’s favorite spot. Their spot. 

_T: Man, that is so beautiful. I love our spot... I cannot wait to be there with you again._

_ T: What I wouldn’t give to be there right now with you. I had to call. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry Armie. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me. I’m having a freak out. _

_ A: It’s okay. I'm sorry about that Tim, and I'm sorry about the videos. I'm sorry I hurt you, again. I’m just so happy to see you, hear your voice. _

_T: Listen man, I didn’t mean to upset you. I just, you know, I just flipped out when I saw those videos, and I felt so hurt and alone, again. And it was the BAFTAS, and the memories from last year were so fresh in my mind, and they hurt, and on top of it all, I lost again, got drunk and just kind of lost it in general. And I know I love you, and I believe you love me, I just really need to feel you on me and in me right now. It’s been too long and I think my mind is going crazy with all of distance between us. But the thought of not continuing this thing with you is unbearable. I would rather die than think I cannot be with you again. _

_T: I got off the phone and realized that the only thing in this huge fucking world that I care about is my relationship with you. I'm not sure it will ever change. We are meant to be together Armie, and I know that the universe will make it happen. The universe brought us together three years ago, and anything worth having is never easy. I'm willing to fight, to hurt, and to wait for you. For as long as it takes, I will be here, waiting until you are mine._

_ A: You have no idea how much that means to me. I know so much of this relationship is up to me, and I promise as soon as the time is right with the kids, I will make the final move to be together. But until then, I will try and protect your heart. You must believe me when I say you have my heart, right now Tim. It is yours. _

Timmy hears Armie sniffle and wipe his eyes.

_T: Cor codium, Armie._

_A: Cor cordium, Tim._

_T: I can't believe I called and you were at our spot. I really do wish I was there with you right now. I'd shout to the world again that I am yours._

_A: That was an incredible day. This place is amazing, but it's not the same here without you. Don’t laugh, but I think it has special powers, because I came here and just begged, out loud, for you to call me, and you did._

_ T: Hmmmm, I like that. Of course our spot has special powers. And great memories. _

They are both quiet for a moment, just appreciating each other's beautiful faces, and the love between them coming from opposing lives. Sometimes you can't explain love, you just have to accept it.

_A: Tim, I have been looking forward to London for weeks. Please, please say you will see me Wednesday for dinner, and then stay with me. I have it all arranged for us. It is going to be a special night. If you won’t see me, I’ll lose my fucking mind. Please tell me we will wake up together in London, on Valentine’s Day? I have to hear it before I get on that fucking plane tomorrow._

Timmy shakes his head, curls falling into his eyes as he looks down.

_ T: I can’t promise you that Armie.... _

Armie’s heart sinks for a moment. There is silence and then slowly Tim lifts his eyes back to the screen...

_T: Don’t we technically have to fall asleep in order to wake up?_

Timmy laughs and sticks his tongue out at Armie. He is such a fucking tease.

_A: I’m gonna fucking kill you when I get my hands on you! God I love you, sweet T. Rest that tongue though Tim, you’ll need it full strength on Wednesday. And don’t forget to sleep in our sweater before I get there._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. Peace and love to all of you lovely Charmie readers and writers.

**Author's Note:**

> More chapters coming as quickly as I can load them, most are written. Thank you so much for reading!


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